My husband is out all night

posted 1 month ago in Parties
Post # 16
Member
6171 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

First of all, I hope this is a case of your husband being a fucking dumbass and not dead. That established, I would not be willing to do this with my husband or anyone I was partnered with (and pregnant by). FYI – I agree with the poster that this is probably not the first time he’s done something like this. The fact that you said you were staying up in case you needed to “take care of him” gave that away. What is that mess? Why would you need to take care of a grown man who was just getting together with someone for a few drinks unless being sloppy is a regular occurrence for him?

Because this kind of BS tops my “No the fuck we won’t.” list, once my husband came home, I’d have a bag packed for him and let him know that he needed to get the fuck out of my house until he was ready to be a grown up. Period. No concessions. No discussion.

If he’s not ready to adult, now is the time to dump his ass, before your baby comes and shit gets really fucking real.

Post # 18
Member
405 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2020 - City, State

I was pregnant the FIRST time my ex pulled this kind of thing. I was so worried, and it was 1999, so I just sat at home, calling only the friend’s home that I knew he was visiting. There was no texting. 

Well, the result of that was that the ex said he was “stranded” in the woods when he attended an overnight war reenactment with his bud, and nobody would drive him back to the home where his vehicle was. Ugh, I was so mad, and at the time, I semi-believed the excuse, but it did not take too long, after repeated behaviors, that I knew he was full of it. 

And, yeah, I called his friend’s home phone many times, and all that did for me was open me up to be lied about when said friend would lie and say I called his home all hours of the night… on other occasions, beyond this night, which I never did, but for the “war reenactment” night. 

I hope your situation is better, but if he was off being an idiot, you really need to make your expectations clear. 

Post # 20
Hostess
8536 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: Dorset, UK

If my husband pulled this shit he would be looking for a new place to live and a new wife. 

 

What was his answer for staying out? 

Post # 21
Member
3537 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

My husband has done this one time.  He was out with a coworker celebrating a big win and didn’t realize what a lightweight he has become in his old age.  He ended up passing out in his car for several hours to sober up, and then made his way home around 3 or 4am.  We had a little talk when he got home.  He felt bad, it was a one off, and I let it go.

Post # 22
Member
1312 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: City, State

After I knew he wasnʻt in an accident, in the hospital, or dying somewhere… Iʻd see what his excuse is and that would be a wrap on the relationship tbh

Post # 23
Member
1116 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2019 - USA

TwilightRarity :  Agree with alllllathat. This behavior is totally unacceptable for any husband, let alone a father-to-be. This would make me really nervous for the future. 

Post # 24
Member
540 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2020 - New York, New York

His behavior was so thoughtless to you, and even more so since you’re pregnant with his child. Going out all night and leaving you in the dark definitely doesn’t show maturity. I would talk to him about what he did and why it was wrong, and see how he responds during the conversation. Remorse and taking a hard look at himself and making lasting, positive changes would be a good sign. If it happens again (or multiple times), I would seriously consider leaving.

Post # 26
Member
3537 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

Now *I’m* worried out OP’s husband. 

Post # 27
Member
900 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

This is starting to get weird and concerning OP went awol!

Post # 29
Member
258 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2029

Mrs_Beer :  My thoughts exactly!  I’d be worried about him, but more angry then anything.  I’m paranoid as is and my mind would go to cheating.  I’ve never heard of a decent partner pulling crap like your husband is.  When he comes homes (hopefully he is ok), I would drill him and tell him that this is unacceptable!

Post # 30
Member
190 posts
Blushing bee

OP!! Whaaaaat happened??

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