(Closed) My husband' parents possibly can't make the wedding. Change the location?

posted 5 years ago in Logistics
  • poll: Where should we have the wedding?

    Seattle, Washington

    Dallas, Texas

  • Post # 2
    7440 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    What does your husband say? Frankly, as they missed the first it would be very unfortunate for them to miss the second. I would imagine he would want his parents there this time atleast.

    Post # 3
    1227 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2016 - Painswick Church and the Falcon Hotel

    I think it’s important for his parents to be there specially as they missed the first wedding 

    Post # 5
    7440 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    View original reply
    lexybach :  Parents trump location, IMO. Especially since you are already married.

    Post # 7
    7440 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    You are putting cost over value. The cost is a finite but the worth of his parents being there for his other wedding is high in value. The money will be forgotten but excluding his parents the second time around will not be. Talk to him. Talk to your parents and his. Reach a solution that works for everyone. 

    And no, you do not have to fly the photographer. You will probably lose the deposit but you could also use what you paid to other photos so far to something in your area at another date. Anniversary or another special occasion.

    Post # 8
    790 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    For me the most important thing would be to have my parents at the wedding so yes, I would move the weddding to a venue where his dad could get to. It’s not his dads fault he’s unwell and like you said, he missed the first courthouse wedding and it would be really crap if he missed the celebration because you guys don’t like Texas.


    Post # 11
    10 posts

    I think you should have a small family event there in texas with close family members. By this even your husband and his parents will be very happy. There would be an extra burden on your savings but its worth going there.

    Post # 12
    3756 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom

    That is a sticky situation! 

    My Father-In-Law and late Mother-In-Law were in a similar situation. During their engagement process her father fell critically ill. He went into the hospital and wasn’t expected to come out level of ill. It was important for her to have her Dad at her wedding. So they chose to get married in the hospital chaple in the middle of winter (even though they had a beautiful summer wedding planned). He died DAYS after the wedding. They never once regretted it.

    Post # 13
    1898 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I don’t really get what ‘not liking texas’ has to do with anything. You don’t have to love the state you get married in, you just need to find a nice venue. I am sure somewhere in the state of texas there is a venue you would like.

    The point of having the second wedding sounds like it’s for your friends and FAMILY to see you get married. It sounds silly to me to have a second wedding, and then be like “oh sorry dad- sorry you’re sick and cant fly. better luck next time”. 

    forget the deposits- it stinks, but I think letting a father see his son get married trumps ‘we dont like texas’.

    Post # 14
    1115 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

    I think his parents trump the location. I’m sure you can find a nice venue in texas! 

    Post # 15
    13957 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    You’re married already, and this is a delayed reception in honor of your marriage. So if the logistics are not working for everyone to be in one place, why not scale back and do two more casual events, one in Seattle and one in Dallas?

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