(Closed) my husband’s sister is a monster

posted 7 years ago in Family
  • poll: should an officiant be separated from his wife and kids so he can ride in the "party bus" ?
    yes, if it is important to the bride! : (46 votes)
    46 %
    no, officiants are not even members of the wedding party. : (40 votes)
    40 %
    no, couples shouldn't be separated at celebrations of unions! : (11 votes)
    11 %
    other (please explain) : (3 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    963 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    Sounds like she’s just a jealous snotty b*tch. I’d not worry about trying to please her.  She likes that – she likes knowing you are bending over backwards to please her.  Just stop. Ignore her.  I wouldn’t go to the wedding at this point.  She’s uninvited you and defriended you…she’s made her decision.

    You sound very nice.  I wish you could get along with her, but unfortunately, we just can’t get along with everybody in this world. I’m sorry.

    Post # 4
    3521 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    Wow, she’s either freaky-close to her brother or just a controlling weirdo. At least your husband stood by you! That’s the important thing to remember. If she comes around, great; if not, it’s no great loss because it sounds like she was kind of out-there before she got engaged, too.

    Post # 5
    6351 posts
    Bee Keeper

    My FI’s sister thinks I am the epitome of all evil. Thank God she lives on the other side of the country.

    You sound like a very kind, very reasonable sister in law. I’m sorry she is treating you this way. I’m glad your Darling Husband stood up for you. He’s a good one.

    Post # 6
    2192 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    She certainly doesn’t sound like a nice person at all. I am sorry that you are dealing with all of this. I wouldn’t give her anymore thought. You have a wonderful life from the sounds of it and she is just a minor annoyance. Give her some time and see if she relaxes a little bit. Could be stress of her wedding magnifying her nastiness. Good Luck!

    Post # 7
    7431 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    @BackyardLoveBird: Totally agree, sometimes people like her do things purposely just to see how far you will bend, and hopefully break. I know its hard, but please try not to let her behavior offend you any longer.  Go about your business without giving her a thought, and realize that your marriage will be a much happier one then hers

    Post # 8
    3620 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    My DH’s sister hates me too – we used to get along really well, until the engagement. After that, forget about it. She too, was upset that we married before she got engaged (still not engaged) and took it out on us rather than communicating with her live-in boyfriend. Some people can’t be reasoned with – my husband always says “you can’t reason with crazy.” It sucks, because I always wanted a sister… but your husband did the right thing, and you can only do so much. You’re only one woman.

    Post # 9
    1927 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I’m actually with his sister on the issue of traveling from the wedding to the reception.  In most cases the bridal party is expected to stay with the bride and groom and their dates travel separately.  We had 14 people in our bridal party… we certainly couldn’t fit their dates in the limo too! My uncle who officiated traveled with us and my aunt (his wife) drove separately. I’m sure there is someone else in the family who could have helped if you needed assistance managing the kids.

    But… the sister seriously over reacted and went way overboard with the craziness.  There was no need to completely cut ties with both of you and fire her brother from the officiating job.  I would try to just give her some space and hope things can calm down eventually.

    And I’m confused about the location..  You say that you are so uncomfortable with this location because your husband had his first wedding there.  But then you go on to say that you are building your home on that property….?  I would assume if you’re going to live there then there is no reason that you can’t be comfortable there for a wedding ceremony.

    Post # 10
    2204 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    @Moose1209: I was thinking the same thing!

    Your SIL clearly went off the deep end BUT I don’t think it’s totally unreasonable for her to expect you to get yourself and 3 kids to the reception. I know, it’s not ideal and it’s selfish on her part, especially considering your husband isn’t a groomsman, he is (or was) the officiant.

    I can understand being nervous/anxious going to your first family wedding but, you’re married and know his family now right? And you’re building a house on that property? So I guess I just don’t understand why it would upset you that the wedding reception is there. Your husband married you and you guys had your own wedding, I just don’t see why you would be emotional attending a wedding at this location?

    Post # 12
    3942 posts
    Honey bee

    @clytemnestra2010: I agree with you that his sister WAY over reacted. But its not that uncommon to sometimes have to travel separately when only one of your are in the bridal party. My SO and I have done it multiple times.

    Post # 13
    6597 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Im sorry I kind of agree with the sister on the traveling thing. It is fairly common for the wedding party to travel without their guests and she wants him to be a part of that.

    In the grand scheme of things it is not a big deal to travel to the reception with your 3 kids without your husband.

    I think she overreacted with the way she dealt with the situation (and your engagement/wedding situation) but I also think you should’ve just gone along with it in the first place.

    Post # 16
    1667 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    @clytemnestra2010: I think you are being too nice to her. Time to step it up a notch. Don’t let her make you miserable like this! If she is being a beotch, then put her in her place!

    The topic ‘my husband’s sister is a monster’ is closed to new replies.

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