- 5 years ago
- Wedding: October 2015
After 1,5 years of long distance of 14 000 km, I married to him and decided move. He was living with his mom at a house they shared ( they owned this house together years ago) This was a red flag for me, i told my concerns and he will care the most for my happiness in the house. Then i couldn’t get a work visa since we never lived together and only been together 8 weeks in total. I loved him so much and the idea of what if I am missing the love of my life ( like in movies yeah) cought me badly and I made the move with big hopes.
I had no idea how things will be challenging for newlywed to learn to living together for the first time. His mother was acting strange, and i started feel more and more isolated, disappointed, doubt of my future and worried. Even I spoke well english (english speaking country) and tried to make a social life I was crying all day. I felt I am the only one in the house to be adopting to live together. There were times I felt i matter the least at the house, like my husband did not stand by me with issues occured with my mother in law. because she was getting upset when i wanted to eat my dinner privately with my husband , we were eating altogether. I felt I had no independence in the house.
We tried to move but as just my husband worked we didn’t have enough money. I told my husband to sell the house and we have our own life with our share and her mother could rent a house anywhere she likes. But my husband said he can not do that. He was so afraid to break his mothers hearth, but I felt like he had no hesitation to break mine, i became very agressive and also broke his hearth than I bought my ticket and come back to my country.
I know what we gone through our life is all experience, but i feel so stupid to give away my flat, furnitures, quit my job. Now i look for job, and have to live with my parents.After I came back to my country I begged him to get rid of this house but he cant.I had a really bad temper and told him I want to divorce, than regret what i said and apologised him back. I can not stop feeling that I am in his eyes worthless than a house. I idealialised our relationship so much. I never thought of the risks. Now as we discuss and i told him, i come across i critisized him a lot, he closed himself. Says he is broken wants to be on his own. I have no trust that he will come here to be with me, he can take the same risks. He loves me less than I do love him I guess. Which I have to accept. And with all happened we both broken we are going through divorce.