(Closed) My MIL is matching my wedding look!!

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 2
2141 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

just tell her no… I have no idea why people pussyfoot around this, its obviously attention seeking behavior and anyone with half a braincell would know its a no and you cant do that but sometimes some selfcentered people actually need to be told ‘no’ to get the message

let her sulk but the wedding is not about her so she’ll either get over it or look like the petty one

Post # 3
7881 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Imitation is the highest form of flattery. I was an easygoing bride, so I’d let it go. She will learn her own lesson. You will look fantastic, and people will wonder why she chose to wear what she did. The bride and Mother-In-Law pictures will look very interesting. 

Post # 4
6798 posts
Busy Beekeeper

View original reply
btob17 :  Better still, have fiance tell her no.  It’s his mom and even he doesn’t sound happy about it. 

Want to point out though that lipstick and shoes?  You just need to suck it up there.

Post # 5
7679 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

View original reply
vintagefemme :  You could:

Have Fiance tell his mom that people will be talking about her behind her back.

Have your mom wear something similar to the rehearsal tonight?

Spill red wine on her just before the wedding?  jk.

Ignore it.

Post # 6
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Yeah have Fiance tell her he doesn’t want his mom looking like his bride and she needs to go back to the first dress. 


Post # 7
814 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

View original reply
vintagefemme :  your fiance needs to tell her not to wear this!

Post # 9
6798 posts
Busy Beekeeper

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vintagefemme :  Are you near enough that you can bring your dress over and lay it beside hers? Maybe an ounce of perspective, but honestly she sounds like she’s made up her mind no matter what you do.  I think she’s being delusionally rude if so many people have already told her it’s inappropriate.  

Post # 10
4807 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

View original reply
vintagefemme :   Does she live nearby?  Can you have her bring the dress over and hold it up next to yours?    

It’s great that you are cool with the idea – but I’d ask your Fiance to nix the idea.  She will be in the main family photos and will look like an identical twin in the photos.  

The dark blue dress would be perfect and she won’t be the subject of nasty gossip.  

Post # 11
6286 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

Let’s hope she comes to her senses and chooses to wear the blue dress; if she doesn’t, it will reflect badly on her.

Post # 12
765 posts
Busy bee

can you have your partner speak to her if it bothers you?

Imitation is a form of flattery- but maybe your partner can talk her into the idea that the other dress is more suited.

Post # 13
217 posts
Helper bee

Since Future Father-In-Law doesn’t seem too keen on the idea of her wearing this dress either, can you guys hide it?

Post # 14
1076 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

No one is that stupid. She damn well knows that the dress looks very similar to yours. She’s playing dumb because she wants to wear it. 

Post # 15
667 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I think your fi needs to firmly and kindly put his foot down. This wouldn’t be up for discussion to me. She doesn’t need to agree. She does need to be mature and respectful, and not make a damned fool of herself. I’d take her shopping, and make it out to be an enjoyable bonding experience, but encourage her very strongly to choose another dress, or go with the blue one. If she continues to refuse, you can tell her the white lace dress is absolutely, obviously innappropriate and you would really prefer that she didn’t wear it this one night, and ask that she respect your feeling on the matter and just choose another dress. That’s not asking too much. 

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