(Closed) My moh doesnt like her dress

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
625 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m sorry…Have you considered picking one specific color and allowing your bridal party to choose their own dress in that color? That’s what I’m doing. I figure that way they can get something they like AND that is within their budget.

Post # 4
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

No, my girls were pretty easy going.  What specificaly did she say she didn’t like about it, and what does the dress look like?

I WAS a Maid/Matron of Honor that wasn’t a big fan of the dress that was chosen once, but I just felt like it was strapless and showed so much skin.  I would have worn it and shut up, but just expressed that I was a little uncomfortable, so the bride was happy to just provide us with shawls.  Easy peasy solution.

Post # 5
Member
496 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Flyjuly:  My Maid/Matron of Honor also doesn’t like her dress. She wanted short but I wanted long so I went with long. I got a lot of comments about it, nothing super rude, really, but I know she isn’t happy. It bugs me, but I’m over it.

Post # 6
Member
284 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

No advice, but these threads just *slay* me. I have been in weddings and just said to the bride ‘pick what you love, i’ll put it on!’  I mean, it’s one day, who cares if you like the dress or not, put the dang thing on and step on out in it. I’m so sorry you are getting grief from your Maid/Matron of Honor.

Post # 7
Member
2961 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

It’s only one day she has to wear it and she will get over it. I can not tell you how many Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses I had that were immediately passed on to my nieces after the weddings for them to play dress-up!

Post # 8
Member
8472 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Everybody wants to be comfortable in their dress.  I’m sure there was SOMETHING out there that you both could have agreed on. 

Post # 9
Member
268 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Is she uncomfortable with the dress or just doesn’t like the style?

If its about style or color – and I don’t mean to be rude – but she should just roll with it. My friends/family and I don’t have the same styles, but for my wedding, my girls are wearing something in my style. For their weddings, I wore things in their style. 

But, I was always comfortable with how I looked in the dresses, even if they weren’t what I’d pick to wear myself!

If she is uncomfortable (too short/too tight/too much skin showing for her), then I would work with her about changing the dress. It could be a simple fix, like adding straps, or building up a neckline a little bit. Feeling uncomfortable in a dress is the worst feeling!

Post # 10
Member
951 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I was once a bridesmaid who wasn’t crazy about the dress… The dress itself was very pretty, but just not flattering on me. I have small boobs, small wasit, and a big ol’ butt, lol. Empire waist dresses don’t exactly do my figure justice.

 

Does she think it’s an ugly dress? Or is she just not happy with how she looks in that style?

Post # 11
Member
7 posts
Newbee

Having been a Maid/Matron of Honor who actively disliked her dress I understand your MOH’s opinion but not why she’s giving it to you!  As long as you didn’t go over an agreed upon budget, she’s not super uncomfortable and you didn’t tell her that you wanted her to like the dress she needs to just wear it. 

Sometimes I think brides make that mistake early on in the planning by saying “I want you to like the dress and be able to wear it again.” most  but not all bms go in knowing that they’ll either not wear the dress again or do not have someplace formal enough to wear it again even if they wanted to. When the bride repeatedly tells them she wants them to love it they are eventually going to tell her they don’t. 

Post # 12
Member
9 posts
Newbee

Oh my goodness!  This is crazy to me.  I’ve been in five weddings and only like one out of the five bridesmaid dresses that I wore.  But, you better believe I never said ONE word of that to any of the brides!  It’s not the maid or honor or bridesmaid choice of what she wears!!! ITS NOT HER WEDDING.  I am SHOCKED at these posts saying the bride and Maid/Matron of Honor should agree on a dress.  That’s INSANE.  She should wear WHATEVER the bride picks out without saying one word of negativity about it.  I can’t believe you’re entertaining thoughts about having the bride give up what she wants for a girl in the wedding = INSANE.  Wow.   

Post # 13
Member
9074 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

My girls were beautiful. I gave them a selection of colors & styles I liked, they picked the one they liked best.

It was fabulous.

@AprilMedina:  “She should wear WHATEVER the bride picks out without saying one word of negativity about it.”

My best friend is my maid of honor. If she didn’t like something and didn’t tell me, I’d totally be weirded out. It’s unusual for her. These people are my friends and if they’re not happy, I’m not happy. I’m not a delicate little flower that can’t take a, “You know what? This dress is ugly/too bright/makes my boobs look like watermelons/ass looks fat/whatever.”

I get that it’s the “bride’s day”, but these are people that I assume you call friends and family. Wouldn’t you want them to be at least a bit remotely happy? They’re the ones that have to wear the dress, not you. So if it’s uncomfortable or makes them feel self conscious in some way (If this is the case), wouldn’t you want to alleviate that and not make them suck it up just because it’s “your day”?

Post # 14
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I have been in 7 weddings, and to be honest, I’ve hated every bridesmaid dress, BUT I NEVER would have said that to the bride. It’s one day. She agreed to be your Maid/Matron of Honor (which means wearing what you want) and she will definitely live. Try not to lose sleep over it!

Post # 15
Member
1607 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@MissKit:  Could you give her the number/name of a lady who does alterations? She can get it cut short after the wedding.

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