(Closed) my MOH has stepped down via text message! Really need advice!

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: My MOH has been flakey and stepped down via text, the other is being semi-flakey, should I:
    Dump them both & replace MOH with sister-in-law to be & some other friend (my 2 bros are groomsmen) : (4 votes)
    11 %
    Replace MOH with sister-in-law to be, keep current BM : (10 votes)
    29 %
    Try to forgive and forget with MOH and ask her if she still wants to be in wedding have been bf 15y : (21 votes)
    60 %
  • Post # 3
    1811 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    @Kristin2012:  I don’t have any experience with this sort of thing so I can’t offer any advice, but I have dealt with “oversensitive” people (especially when it comes to one way communication like texts and emails) and I know how frustrated you must feel.  I hope everything works out for you!

    Post # 5
    1811 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    @Kristin2012:  Well pm me if you want to talk about it.  I’m here to listen and share some of my crazy pants over senstive stories!

    Post # 6
    693 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Neither my Maid/Matron of Honor or Bridesmaid or Best Man have their dresses. I personally bought them both one and shipped them (from GAP, they could have done it themselves, but…) and one didnt like and one didnt fit. Bridesmaid or Best Man bought two (didn’t really match, and a little too risque)..my wedding is in 27 days…………………………………………

    Post # 9
    3886 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I think you really need to sit down with her and talk face-to-face. So much of our communication is done by text and email and facebook these days that we lose a lot of the personal connections, plus we don’t always write or read things in the spirit that they are really meant.  I’d definitely cool off a bit before getting together, and plan/rehearse what you want to say and how you want to say it because it’s probably going to be an emotional conversation. And I’d leave the other bridesmaid completely out of it. This is between you and the MoH, not between you, the MoH and the BM; bringing a third person into the situation only increases the drama and potentially makes the MoH feel ganged up on. 

    I’m not saying you should kick her out of the wedding party nor am I saying you should beg her and plead with her to be your MoH; just saying that it is possible to have her in or out of your bridal party and still maintain the friendship, and her place in the wedding party shouldn’t determine the future of your friendship, and that really some conversations are best held in person.

    Post # 10
    6 posts
    • Wedding: November 2012

    Im going through this also. Get another Maid/Matron of Honor. You do not need this added stress. If ya’ll have been friends for 15yrs it should not be a question to do this for you. It’s so crazy how females change during the wedding process. You think they would be happy for you, but they eventually show their true colors. I dumped my Maid/Matron of Honor.

    Post # 11
    67 posts
    Worker bee

    If someone stepped down, let them.  And move on.

    It depends on what level your friend is being flaky.  If you get the impression she doesn’t want to be in the wedding, ASK her what’s up.  Maybe she feels like she can’t afford to participate.  Or maybe she’s just coming off as flaky to you because she has other things going on.  I felt that some of my BMs were flaky, but they just had other things that were more important going on than talking about my wedding.

    The topic ‘my MOH has stepped down via text message! Really need advice!’ is closed to new replies.

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