Post # 1
My younger sister is my Maid of Honor. I couldn’t be happier, as she is my only sister, has been so supportive, and has always been there for me to keep me sane through the beginning of the planning process. My other two maids are best friends from grade school. I have 4 FSILs but they are not in the wedding party. No hard feelings, they understand that 7 BMs is overkill for our small destination wedding. My bridesmaids and FSILs are very willing to help my Maid/Matron of Honor with all of the planning, parties, and showers because she’s only 18 and still in high school. Really, I just feel SO thankful to have all of these awesome ladies in my life.
My GFs want to know… What do I want to do for the Bachelorette party?! I want my sister to be included but I have always pictured the event dancing the night away in a drunken haze. Is it selfish to go to a bar or club when she isnt old enough to get in? I have asked her if it would hurt her feelings if we went out without her and she said it wouldn’t but I am not sure if that is really true. Any advice? Anyone with the same situation?
Post # 3
@Nrp0704: Do something before hand, like in a hotel or at someones house. You know all the wild bach party games! No drinking inculded. Have her took home afterwards then go clubbing with your girls that are old enough to.
You could even have a few glasses of wine during the games, I am sure she wouldn’t mind. Ask her!
Post # 4
If she says she’s ok with it, take her at her word, but be sensitive about it. Start with festivities she can join (dinner, spa, or start at home, etc.) and let the evening wind down (heat up?) with your drunken haze without her. Also consider a separate event with just her later.
Post # 5
Mr.ND and the guys are going to a hockey game and getting a suite. Those that are old enough can drink, my bros and the younger guys can just eat and enjoy the game.
Could you go bowling or have a spa date or something like that right after dinner so that everyone can be there (and drink a bit if they’d like), and then hit the clubs later in the evening (like 10ish- that’s when they start getting busy anyway)? If there are 18+ clubs, she could still attend those.
Post # 6
What about a spa day? I may be getting old, but that seems more fun to me than getting really wasted.
Post # 7
Thanks for input! I guess there is way more to a bachelorette party then just hitting up the bar! If we planned it well and had dinner, games, etc. in a location that was under 21 friendly, she could be included on most of the events!
Post # 8
Get her a fake ID. Problem solved.
I really like all the other suggestions bees have added. Sometimes it’s just fun to hang out, play games, swap stories, instead of going out and getting wasted.
Post # 9
@MissHobbit: No, you’re not getting old! I’m 21 and I think that sounds wayyy better than drinking. But, then again, I’m not a drinker.
OP – I know this probably isn’t what you’re interested in, because you sound set on going to a bar or club, but when I was 18, I was a bridesmaid for a friend (who was also 18) and we did the bachelorette party at another one of the BM’s houses. We played all those bachelorette party games and had prizes that had weiners all over them 😉 Haha. We had food, and I even made a penis-shaped cake. It was super fun, and there was no drinking. If you still want to go out and drink, I think it would be nice to include your sister in some kind of alcohol free get-together before you go out with your of-age BMs.
Post # 10
@Nrp0704: Oh, and another thing I meant to say… I’m not sure how it is where you live, but basically all the clubs in my area you can get into if you are 18 or over. If you’re not 21, they’ll just put Xs on your hands or give you a wristband or something so the bartender knows not to serve you alcohol, but you can still get in, dance, party, whatever, just can’t drink. Maybe there are clubs like that somewhere in your area?
Post # 11
Will your sister turn 19 soon? When is her birthday? If you could put your bachelorette party off until after she turns 19, then you could drive up to Vancouver for the night and she could join in.
Post # 12
@MissHobbit I agree. I had a bachelorette party for BFF and about 15 of us went to the spa got manicures and peticures and then went out and got fondue. Everyone loved it and there was no drinking involved. We were all old enough to drink just wasn’t what anyone really wanted.
Post # 13
@Lemma: Possible ignorant question warning: Is the drinking age in Canada 19?
Post # 14
@CarolinaCola: Yes! And 18 in Quebec!
Post # 15
@FMM: Hm. I learned something new today.
Post # 16
I’m going to have a non-drinking bachelorette party, so this is a question very near and dear to my heart. I second the ideas of making it a bachelorette party “day” or “weekend” in a cute location, rather than just one wild night out at the club. That way your sister could participate in day activities like:
– spa day
– afternoon tea
– Broadway/theater show
– something adventurous if that’s your personality like white water rafting or skydiving
– taking some kind of class, cooking/hot yoga/dancing
– going on a hike
Then in the evening, have a nice dinner then if you must go to the bar/club and get free drinks/attention, Maid/Matron of Honor could stay behind and get things ready at the hotel room or apartment where you will be staying that night. Come back from the club later, and continue the party with more drinks/games/bonding activities. That way rather than feeling like she’s just being ditched, she’ll have a job to do while the rest of you are out drinking.