- 6 years ago
- Wedding: June 2012
I asked my BFF to be my Maid/Matron of Honor. She said yes and was super excited. When she was trying on possible Maid/Matron of Honor dresses, she kept mentioning that she and her husband were trying to get pregnant. So, she wanted to have a couple of “preggers” options, in case she got pregnant sooner rather than later.
With that in mind, she’s had a lot of drama in her life lately. With that drama, she has cut a lot of people out of her life… including me. I had barely spoken with her for almost 2 months. The only times we spoke was when I called or texted her. Granted it wasn’t often (I am a full-time worker, fiance, AND planning a wedding by myself), but when we did speak, it was very awkward and uncomfortable. I kept wondering if I had done something wrong that I didn’t know about. Maybe I didn’t check on her and her drama enough?? Maybe I wasn’t a good enough friend when I didn’t even know what she was dealing with?? I had no idea.
On top of all this, keep in mind that she kicked me out of her wedding several years ago. In short, we had a miscommunication that I thought we worked out. Apparently not. She told me she would rather me simply come to the wedding, but not be in the wedding. Ok, I got over it and was fine. Then, I was never invited. In fact, She didn’t speak to me for 6 months. Even went to the point of defriending me on Facebook. Who does that???
Ok, enough backstory. Due to all of that, you can imagine all the different scenarios going through my mind. Once her recent drama finally died down, we had dinner together (this was last week). After finding out that she in fact IS pregnant (I found out through her facebook status), she told me she cannot be in the wedding. She says it is a money issue. Being in my wedding will cost around $200 for dress, shoes, and baby alterations, plus hotel for one night at the wedding. Because she is having a second child, she has a lot of finances weighing on her with preparing for Baby #2… doctor’s bills, furniture, decorating baby room, etc. She said that she is just stressed out about the money and cannot be in the wedding. However, she will definitely be at the wedding, just not in the wedding.
I understand money issues. I have them myself. I’m fine with that. However, the more I think about it, I just feel weird about it. She was PLANNING on getting pregnant when I asked her to be my Maid/Matron of Honor. She was even planning to by a dress that would suit her preggers body. So, is she being honest? Is it really money issues? Did it simply just hit her all of a sudden? Or is it something else that she’s not be honest about??
I am so confused. I don’t know what to think. Should she still be invited? Should I take her word? Should I call her out and ask her about it? Should she be invited? What should I do???