(Closed) My mother gave away my engagment ring

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 31
Member
258 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

That’s insane, I’m soooo sorry for you, your mom, and your FH to be in this situation! I would be very hurt and angry aswell. I agree with PPs, this was not your grandmas ring to give to someone else. I mean, it was given to your mom, and very gracious of her given to your FH, to be YOUR ring. If your grandma would’ve wanted your cousin to have it, she should’ve given it to your aunt!

I completely have no clue on how your cousin could even claim this ring. I think it’s incredibly rude of her, especially since she’s not even newly engaged. Did she just wait ’til your mom would give up the ring, or does she have another one? It looks like it was never brought up before that she was supposed to get it. I would freak out on her and get that dammit ring back. I wouldn’t let anyone else wear my moms ring. 

How is your FH handling the situation? I’d be furious and embaressed (not rightfully so, but I’m sure he feels kind of bad about it). Try to make sure that he’s ok and none of the drama is his fault 🙂

Post # 32
Member
1817 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

@Rosie Girl: Oh yea, I don’t walk on eggshells and I don’t care if my family doesn’t like me, this kind of behavior is unacceptable. That ring was the one her fiance chose to give to her as a symbol of his love and commitment. Tarnishing that is just deplorable.

Post # 33
Member
2051 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2006

Jesus Christ. After 30 years on your mom’s finger it wasn’t your grandmother’s to give anymore. Also, if it was already your engagement ring for five months and your cousin just wants it as an extra ring and not her engagement or wedding ring (assuming she has one of her own) , she’s being selfish. When was she planning on asking your mom for it? It seems like she forgot about it, heard you have it, and now suddenly wants it again. You poor thing. And your poor fiancé who thought this ring business was behind him.

Post # 35
Member
1945 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Oh my gosh! I would be distraught if I were in your situation. I don’t know what I would do if someone took my engagment ring away from me after five months, and I do think it was YOUR ring, because you were proposed to with it, and you had it for months. I don’t know how your cousin with a clear conscience can wear your ring and be okay with it!! Everytime I saw her with that ring on her finger at every family function or whatever would just make me so upset! Oh my…I really hope you get this straightened out and keep up posted. Good luck!

Post # 36
Member
851 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Wow I echo other bees.. if your grandma gave it to your mom, it was your mom’s ring! Not on loan to your mom!  How ridiculous! I’m so sorry.. why didn’t your cousin want it sooner if she’s been engaged so long?

 

Ugh.. I’d be angry as your cousin and grandma.. if your grandma gave it to your mom she needs to let go.. and your cousin should understand your mom’s ring would mean a lot to you….

 

wow. Just wow. I’m so so sorry.

Post # 37
Member
278 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Wow!! Crazy awful (and slightly confusing) situation! I don’t have much to say, but I’m impatiently waiting to hear what happens next!!

Post # 38
Member
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Wow, this souunds like yor cousin is hating on you big time. This story sound fishy, why would your GMA give this ring to your mother and not your aunt. Does, your cousin have her own ring, why did she wait so long to ask for it…I got it because your Fiance proposed to you with it and she probably was ringless or just mad she didn’t have anything passed on to her. Seriously, I would embrass her at every family function…Saying how does she like YOUR engagment ring…I don’t care it is yours and you were proposed with that ring not your cousin. Your cousin is sick to want to wear a ring that somebody else was proposed to with, and family at that..Just sickening.

Post # 39
Member
1200 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Wow, wish the mom would have not mailed it. I know grandma and cousin would be mad, but sometimes you have to put your feeling first. Especially given the history of the ring for the last 30 years. Hope you guys work this out!

Post # 40
Member
3457 posts
Sugar bee

Would your mom ask to get it back from cousin? This is crazy, I would be so mad!! It’s your mom’s ring, she’s had it for 30 years! It’s not your grandma’s to give anymore.

Post # 41
Member
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2012
Post # 42
Member
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Confused… If your grandma gave the ring to your mom, then it’s your mom’s ring, not your grandma’s. I think grandma is way out of line here. It’s not her ring to give. And it’s not your mom’s ring to give away either because she gave it to you.

I would be pissed off. Heck, I’m pissed off and this isn’t even happening to me. I would not take this gracefully if this happened to me. I would throw off the boxing gloves and throw a fit until I got my engagement ring back.

Maybe you can talk with your cousin and grandma about it. Or maybe your mom should because this has been HER ring for the past three decades and she’s the one who gave it away.

Post # 43
Member
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Is your mom still there? You can still tell her you want it back. She can still get it back. 

Post # 44
Member
880 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Oh, this whole thing reeks of something my family would do….Your mother had no right to give away the ring she’d already gifted to you and your Fiance.

 

I’d say that now there is bad ju-ju on the ring…I’d have to go out and get something else.

 

((HUG)) So sorry for this.

Post # 45
Member
250 posts
Helper bee

what i don’t understand is that if your grandmother gave her ring to your mother thirty years ago, when exactly did she promise it to your cousin? and if your cousin has been engaged for four years already, why didn’t she ask for it then if she wanted it so badly? and if it’s not going to be an engagment/wedding ring for her, then how does her want of it trump yours since it already is clearly serving a purpose for you? and how does your cousin/grandmother/mom plan on compensating you for the loss of your engagment ring in the case that it is not returned to you?

this is seriously weird. you can’t just give away a ring and then thirty years later tell someone else to take it, especially when it’s already changed ownership again. i can understand your cousin being upset if something was promised to her, but i can’t imagine wanting something so badly that i’d take away something of so much sentimental value to a relative just because i felt “entitled” to it.

The topic ‘My mother gave away my engagment ring’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors