- 8 years ago
- Wedding: June 2012
We have, for the most part, been very fortunate with wedding planning. My mother, Future Mother-In-Law, and FGMIL have mostly just let us do what we want without injecting their opinions in everything. A few suggestions of theirs that they have made, we took them up on and that seemed to satisfy them.
Now as we are getting down to the wire, I guess my mother is more comfortable in expressing her opinion more adamantly. Yesterday she suggested that I change my wedding colors. 28 days to go. Why? Because my bridesmaids are having trouble finding their dresses for the wedding.
So the deal is that I asked my girls to buy knee length solid green dresses that they like and would wear again (and were not kelly green.) My Maid/Matron of Honor bought hers right away and it has been hanging in her closet for months. The other two maids waited until about a week or two ago to start looking–more than casually browsing online–for theirs.
They went out to the mall and couldn’t find anything suitable (Seriously, solid green dresses are not in very large supply) so bridesmaid B called me and said “K and I decided that you have to change your wedding colors.” I laughed. Because she was joking. I asked to what. She said “Anything else! Nah, we’ll look online tonight. It will be fine.”
Well, she called my mom and said the same thing to her, but the joking part was lost, evidently. The next time I saw my mom, she tried to convince me that I had to change my colors so that the girls could find dresses. I said that wasn’t happening, Maid/Matron of Honor bought her dress 8 months ago, bridesmaids B and K knew what I wanted for almost a year, it sucks that they can’t find anything yet, but they haven’t been looking that long, and they did wait until 5 weeks out. My mother shook her head at me and made a sound that means that she thinks I’m being unreasonable and selfish, then exited the room going “Ok, Roe, ok. Whatever you want.”
(I told bridesmaid B all this and she rolled her eyes, said “christ I was joking!” and laughed. Now, if it had gotten to 2 week mark, I would have probably just gone out to Macy’s and bought them all matching ivory dresses and have been done with it. Thankfully, though, both B and K ordered their dresses online 3 days later and the three of them look awesome together.)
Issue two: centerpieces.
My mom hates my idea for the centerpieces bcause they don’t have enough color for her and she thinks they will look drab for a June wedding. I told her that we’re getting married in the woods, the reception is in a barn (at Fallingwater, kinda big on nature) and we’re going for a natural look, so we don’t want any bright colors going against the woodsy feel. We don’t even really have strict colors, I just want greens, whites, and browns everywhere…like nature.
Anyway, I’m making planter boxes, filling them with moss and river stones, and then placing tall sycamore branches (the kind that shed their bark and have beautiful spots of different tones) in the center. I’m hanging ivory sola wood flowers off of the branches at the top. The planter boxes will be surrounded by antique glass bottles in varying colors which will have a couple ranunculus each in them. Here are a couple very bad camera phone photos of very rough mock ups of the tables, with daisies instead of ranunculus:
Anyway, my mother has expressed her opinion on how they aren’t colorful enough about a dozen times. Thats fine, she gets her opinion. I told her that I think between the green and bronze napkins, (not sure if you can see those in the photos) the sola flowers, the fresh flowers at the base, the moss balls we will be buying, there is enough that isn’t brown going on in there for my taste and I think that once I take more that 5 minutes to put one together, it will look really nice, though I will consider adding fern leaves to the base if it needs more green.
We have had this conversation so. many. times. She keeps telling me that she wants me to put one together completely so that she can see it. So that she can pick it apart, really. I told her I know that, but she already knows what it will look like. She asks if, when it is done, I will take suggestions. I tell her no. She freaks, asks why not. I say “Mom, I already know what your suggestions because you have made them many times. I’ve taken them into account and added the flowers as the base, thank you for that, but beyond that I disagree with what you think I should do to them. I’m sorry that you don’t like them but I’m really happy with them, Fiance is happy with them, and I don’t need to hear–again–that you dislike them”
Sigh. I know that these things are really minimal and don’t matter in the long run, but does she really need to be bringing them all up right now? I’m stressed as it is, I don’t need to be thinking about changing everything!
Whew! It felt good just to write that all out.