(Closed) My mother needs help! Emotionally draining me! REALLY LONG Sorry

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
3265 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Wow. I really don’t know what else to say. ((HUGS)) I can’t imagine how frustrating and draining this must be. I feel so terrible for you and your family :(. Kudos to your Fiance for sticking by you through all of this though. He seems to be a really great guy.

Post # 4
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

I pray that your wedding hurries up and gets here.  Are you and your Fiance waiting to live together until after the wedding?  You might wanna speed that up, to preserve your sanity.  This woman is seriously mentally ill.  She needs to be in a facility for the mentally ill.  I feel really bad for your father.

Post # 5
3078 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I can’t even begin to imagine dealing with all of that.  It sounds like you have done everything in your power to support not only your mother but your entire family!  You need to take time for yourself and plan your wedding.  Don’t let your mother get in the way.  You deserve happiness!

Post # 6
48 posts
  • Wedding: October 2012

Wow. That sounds incredibly emotionally exhausting. You know what your mother needs, and it doesn’t sound like a neurologist.

I don’t really understand her fascination with ALS however..I know the forum you’re speaking of as I have used it many times over the past 5 years. My father had ALS. You’re fairly right in saying that a paralyzed person wouldn’t roll from side to side on their own.. also with ALS, it can progress quickly but not so quickly as ‘one day you would wake up paralyzed’.. you can see each stage of paralysis coming, to a point. I suppose in a positive light, you can be very thankful that she doesn’t have it, as it would take this difficult situation and her difficult personality and take it to a whole different level of hardship.

But, I digress.. you know your mom’s condition is more of an emotional variety rather than neuromuscular.. have any of her doctors tried to treat her for this actual condition at hand rather than what she self-diagnoses? I’m not sure what advice to offer you other than I’m so sorry you have such a complex situation on your hands, but to try and put as much space as you can between you and her at this time so that you can focus on this new, happier, more stable life that you are creating for yourself. All the best…

Post # 7
386 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I have to agree with the doctor…..You need to get away from your mother. For the sake of your happiness.

Stay strong. Focus on your wedding. You have to think about your future.


Our love ones sometimes put us on an emotional roller coaster,with the demands, negativity and constant criticism. You are a strong person to continue to do what you do everyday.  

Continue to love her, but focus on yourself now. I think you have done enough for her. 

Post # 8
392 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m so sorry to read what you’ve been going through, you must feel so exhausted. I honestly don’t know what to advise, have you ever hinted to her that you know that she’s able to move? I can imagine that it’s really tempting to just show her the video.

My mums going through a similar problem with my sister. My sister lies a lot, we can’t even tell the truth apart from the lies anymore. My sister keeps having medical problems (she’s type 1 diabetic but refuses to inject) but she never explains the truth to health professionals (such as not eating, not injecting insulin etc). She tends to get particularly ill when attention is on somebody else, such as someones birthday. I know how stressful it can be having a family member play up, just hope that it improves soon. Maybe you could try and go out more (forcing your mum to move to look after herself if she’s home alone)?

Post # 9
7293 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m sorry, I can’t imagine what you are going through.

Is there anyway she could get admitted into a Psych ward or get the help she needs ( therapy, meds, etc) in a controlled environment? She was diagnosed with Conversion disorder…..did the Dr. get into specifics on how you manage that? 

Post # 10
745 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I was going to mention the possibility of a psych evaluation. Sounds like there’s something really wrong with her at this point. Another option is to have hre go back to the nursing home. Though, I think at this point for the sanity of your family, checking into the possibility of a psychological hold is going to be the best bet. Maybe she can get help that way. 

I’m so sorry you’re going through that. 

Post # 15
932 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I am so, so sorry you’re going through this.  It sounds incredibly stressful, frustrating, and painful.  I don’t have any advice to give (I wouldn’t know how to even BEGIN to deal with all of this), but I just wanted you to know that I read the whole thing and that I sympathize with you.  I hope you’re able to find a way to get her the help she needs. 

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