(Closed) My mother ruined my wedding

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2701 posts
Sugar bee

I am so sorry sweetheart. This brought tears to my eyes. I am incredibly happy to hear your outlook on the situation! You sound so strong and resilient, you are my hero! I could not move forward from what was done to you with such positive feelings towards the future. Your mother needs some serious alone time so she can hopefully reflect on herself and learn how to be a decent human being.

Post # 4
Member
3368 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Your photo was beautiful!  My wedding was a flop, and some of that is b/c of mom… but I also have beautiful photos and the amazing memory of saying our vows.  We can’t choose our mothers but we can choose a different life’s path for ourselves, with loving husbands.

Post # 5
Member
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Wow. So sorry to hear about your big day as well as your Mom doing this to you. You have a wonderful outlook on it though!

What I might do if I were in your shoes would be to have another wedding on your 1 year anniversary! Even if it is just you and your hubby! Make this wedding YOUR wedding! Do what you want to do and eat all of the food you missed out on! regardless, you’ll be fine and the picture you posted looks beautiful!

I wish the best for you and your mother, although she really needs a reality check as well as a good thrashing! That sort of blows my mind. but hopefully she can come to you with an apology and start making up for what she did to you and your wedding!

Best of luck!

Post # 6
Member
47 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@JeanieRae: I’m so sorry to hear this. Good for you for looking at the positive side. When I was reading your description of things your mother did. I couldn’t help but think that some of your mother’s behavour didn’t even make sense. I wonder if there is something serious going on with her. Regardless, I liked the idea someone else proposed of you having another special celebration, even if it is just you and your husband. You deserve to feel special and have a wonderful moment together celebrating your marriage.

Post # 7
Member
2951 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

how awful 🙁 im so sorry your mom did this to you. I say have a vow renewal next year and DONT invite her. regardless if you make up or not. thats just terrible. Im so glad your looking at the positives though! hang in there!!!

Post # 8
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

That’s terrible!!! 🙁 It’s good that your focusing on the good in your life: your husband. Hopefully, in time, things will heal. <3 *hugs*

Post # 9
Member
177 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I think that in the near future, maybe your 5 year anniversay throw a smaller cermony with those that important and re-do it.  That way you will have a more positive experience to reflect on.

I worry about this happening with my FI”s grandmother and she had a fit at our engagment party that really upset me. I told him if she even tried I would have my aunts make her leave, no questions asked and if it happens i dont wanna know about it.  It’s too bad no one was there to take control of the situation.

Post # 10
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Your mother is rude!  (Please do forgive me.)  I never understand how ANYone can do such things during a couples wedding.  Don’t they understand that the bride and groom will always remember it. 

On the flip side… your are married.  And that is what you wanted to accomplish.  So enjoy being a newlywed!

@crystalirene:  I agree!  Having a vow renewal is a great idea!

Post # 11
Member
3148 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

How terrible and awful!  Did you endure this while growing up?    You have your Darling Husband and he loves you!  I agree, a future anniversary party/vow renewal would be fabulous for you.  I’m sorry to hear that you’ve had all of this famliy drama.

Post # 12
Member
1542 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’m so sorry you went through this. I agree with the idea of a vow renewal. A big hug for you sweetheart.

Post # 13
Member
395 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

So glad that you are being so positive. Know that you’re the better person for not going all Bridezilla on her (as I am sure that you would have liked to do!)

Your mother is probably jealous, and most definitely never let her steal your joy!!!

OAN, this is EXACTLY why my mother won’t be at my wedding.

Post # 14
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@Baby_Diva: Exactly. If my family member did this, I can’t guarantee that I wouldn’t go completely batshit crazy on them — and I’m a pretty calm person.

Post # 15
Member
1160 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

My mom is a narcissist and I’m leaving her out of everything.

 

I’m SO SORRY this happened to you.Frown

Post # 16
Member
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@JeanieRae: Im so sorry this happened to you. At least when it was all said and done, you married the man of your dreams and thats all that matters. I hope that everything works out for you.

 

GOOD LUCK

 

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