(Closed) My mother shamed me about my registry and now I want to delete it all!! (RANT)

posted 5 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 2
910 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013


BurlapnLace:  My advice is to go onto the registry and add a bunch of things are less expensive. 

Sometimes, guests will give big ticket items as wedding gifts instead of cash (i have seen place settings being given as gifts instead of cash).


Post # 3
129 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Ummm, I registered for that kind of stuff (ie nicer dish wear and serving platters than I would typically buy for myself) and got it all. I would recommend amending your registry to iclude the pieces you want. People will buy what they want. I wouldn’t bat an eye at an $80 gift for a shower.

Post # 4
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Put that stuff YOU wanted back on there. Do not give in to your moms intimidation! Just make sure there is a variety of price points. Keep what you really want on there. Even if you get gift cards, BBB gives you a 20% discount after to get the remaining items. Plus there might be a group of people pooling their money together for gifts. You never know. Just because your mom won’t buy it, doesn’t mean others won’t. 

Post # 5
13384 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

$80 isn’t absurd for a shower or wedding gift.  Register for what you want, and ignore your mom.

Post # 6
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I hate judgment being cast on registries.  My aunt did the same thing – telling me she wasn’t buying me certain pans, because I could buy them for cheaper from online, vs Macy’s (where I registered for them).  If they don’t want to buy you that gift, they won’t!  Simple as that.  Just make sure to have price ranges of gifts. 

Post # 7
294 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

You need to have all sorts of price ranges on there. We had several big ticket items ($200+), some in the 80-100 range, and then plenty of stuff in the under 50 range (lots of under $10 items too!).

Don’t feel bad about putting big ticket items on there. The best thing is to just give people a range to purchase from. 

I agree with PP, $80 seems very reasonable….unless all of your items are over $80, which doesn’t seem to be the case. 

Post # 8
4420 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

As long as you have a range of prices, having some expensive items isn’t a bad thing! Keep your nice dinnerware, matching casseroles, cooking set, etc. and add a few inexpensive useful things – my registry ranged at BB&B ranged from $10 to $400 items and my family is not extravagant. I still got most of it! 

I’m usually frugal, but I would spend $80 on a shower or wedding gift easily. I think your mom may be out of touch with current registries.

Post # 9
2847 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Go back adn put that stuff back on.  And make sure there is a range, so that people who only want to spend $25-$50 have plenty to choose from.  FWIW, if I planned to spend in the $100 range, like I just did for one of DH’s friends, I would gladly buy the $80 fine china serving piece.  I love fine china and I am going to spend what I am going to spend.  It’s no skin off my nose if it is a little piece of china or a bunch of towels.  As long as you have plenty of moderately priced things, ignore your mom.

Post # 11
5930 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

BurlapnLace:  Girl, take a deep breath.

In my opinion, you’ll save yourself a lot of head aches by being mindful about what you put on your registry.  Choose items that you actually like and want.  Don’t register for things you wouldn’t buy yourself, since you’ll probably have to complete some of the sets (you may recieve half the dinner ware or glass ware that you actually need – will you actually want to purchase the rest?).

Making yoru registry shouldn’t be a super market sweep style scan fest, put a little time into creating a real wish list.

Post # 12
2268 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

BurlapnLace:  I’m with other posters….just make sure you have a range! We just registered this weekend and I keep going back to the list and tweaking and adding things and taking things out in an attempt to have a variety of differently priced things!


Post # 13
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Don’t let your mom bother you.  The fact of the matter is, some people love to buy nice items that are usable for years to come for newlyweds and others would prefer to buy a less expensive gift.  Put items on your registry that you LOVE not useless things that will be thrown out next year.  As long as you have a broad range of items from $15 to $300+ I think you will be fine.  My registry consists of mostly $50+ items due to the fact that they are the nicer things that my Fiance and I won’t buy for ourselves but we want/need them.  We have owned our house for 5+ years so most registry items are actually practical items that we really could use!!!! My ultimate plan is to keep up with adding some more less expensive things (ie towels, throw pillows, bed pillows, etc) as they are bought so even the late shoppers still have the option for less expensive items.

Those who are attending my bridal shower know me well, and know that I don’t care if they give me their chewed gum off the bottom of their shoe.  But I did register for things that are expensive and I have had no complaints as of yet from the items on my registry.

Post # 14
1884 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

BurlapnLace:  if it helps, I’ve totally spent $80 and even more on a casserole dish for my friends’ weddings (Le Creuset for example). I personally have items ranging from $25 to $200+ on my registry so that people only spend what they are comfortable with. I don’t expect anyone to cover their plate or anything like that, but I know some of my friends will want to spend $100+ and some will want to spend under $50 due to varying financial situations.

Post # 15
2847 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014


BurlapnLace:  Don’t listen to her.  Mom, registrries are for the convenience of everyone.  My guests don’t want to have to look at 10 different stores to pick out a gift in their price range.  If you are going to keep hasseling me, I am going to stop taking your calls and texts.

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