- 7 years ago
- Wedding: October 2011
My mom has a very strong, forceful type of personality. She very much likes to be in control and run the show. She also believes absolutely that her idea of the best way to do things is THE best way to do things, and she does not tend to like it when you don’t do things the way she wants. In other words, she’s extremely bossy.
Well, I have been wondering when this is going to bite me in the ass during the wedding planning process, and today it finally happened. We were talking about the timeline for the day before the wedding and the day of the wedding, and I was making a list of all the things that needed to be brought to the venue the day before. She, not to be outdone, whips out a pen and paper and starts making her own list. At this point she begins completely ignoring what I am saying, and starts firing off questions at me like I am her employee, or like she’s a drill sargeant or something.
*cue steam coming out of ears*
As much as my mom is a control freak and likes to run the show, I am not at all interested in her bossing me around. She does do a good job of getting things done, but so do I, and I’m sorry, this is MY thing. My wedding, my show to run. I want her to help me, not try to take over and get mad when I want to do things my way.
So I tried to explain this to her, and I told her, “You’re trying to direct me. I don’t need that. I need your help and your support, but I do not need or want you to be directing me in how to get things done.” Naturally, an argument ensued.
What do you recommend I do? Arguing with my mom is absolutely a pointless affair. As strong of a person as she is, she really loves to play the “Oh poor me” card in arguments – “Oh thanks, this is JUST what I need right now, I’m having SUCH a good time right now with work and family drama. Thanks a lot!” Gotta love that kind of bullshit. An argument can never be just about what it is really about with her. She has to drag in how “mistreated” she is in every area of her life and how awful you are for disagreeing with her.
I’m so frustrated. How can I handle this, bees?