(Closed) My newly engaged cousin sets date weeks before our wedding

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
802 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Don’t feel bad for being upset, it’s natural.  But you’re right, you don’t need to be upset about it.  As PPs mentioned, a destination wedding is harder to attend and the date might have been set because it was the most convenient time for them to set the date at that destination.  Also, I know when I get invited to two weddings in a similar timeframe, the one I’ve known about the longest gets priority even if the other one happens first.  Even if I haven’t RSVPed yet, I consider it a prior obligation.  I’ve met a lot of people who think the same way on that, so I wouldn’t be surprised if yours would take priority anyway (though it would be a shame if one had to take priority, I really hope that doesn’t have to happen!).

Post # 18
1109 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I don’t really think it will affect your wedding because it’s destination. I don’t even really think it would have any affect on your wedding anyways. It’ll be kind of fun to have someone who understands your planning woes for the next 7 months.

If she wanted a destination wedding she probably had a slightly more restricted window of time she could set a date in. Don’t take it personally.

And as far as people spending money on your wedding, DH and I went to a wedding once a month last summer and that didn’t make us any less likely to travel or buy a gift for each one. People are used to going to weddings throughout the year so it probably won’t make a difference whether they’re close together or far apart.

Post # 19
413 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I understand completely. We got engaged in Dec and chose a June wedding date. Another close friend couple got engaged that Feb and chose to get married in April, so a few months before us. I was happy for them but was really worried for a while as they were considering choosing the same venue as us. Thank goodness they chose elsewhere Phew!!!!!

Then another close friend couple got engaged just a few months ago and have set their date two weeks before us!! This upset me quiet a bit. I’m over it now but it took a week or so to clear my head. I’m just focusing on our day. Though it does suck that we got engaged first and are the last to get married. 🙁

Post # 20
2063 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Eeek! I hope you aren’t my cousin. I just did this to my cousin and tried really really really hard to make sure that my family understood that we HAD to do this timing and we didn’t expect anyone to make a big deal out of it. I hope, if you are not my cousin, that is the circumstances with your family – I’m sure she didn’t do this to you on purpose. 

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