(Closed) My parents want to help pay for the engagement ring – should I accept it?

posted 2 months ago in Rings
Post # 76
Member
4025 posts
Honey bee

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adam5 :  Congrats! Would love to hear how the proposal goes! 

Post # 77
Member
79 posts
Worker bee

If the money is coming out of a college fund they had set aside for you, which you never used because of scholarships (every parent’s dream!!!), then in my mind, that is still coming out of money you earned, and I’d have no problem accepting! 

Though whether or not I think you *should* be spending that kind of money on a large Tiffany ring is a different matter 🙂  In your shoes, I might be inclined instead to stick with the smaller diamond (or even go to the 1ct mark) and invest the rest of the cash to put towards a down payment on your first home together…but that’s just me putting on my “mom” hat lol. 

Post # 78
Hostess
2394 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

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EricainOlalla :  OP has already addressed this and made his decision

Post # 79
Member
79 posts
Worker bee

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ladyvk :  Yes, I posted my comment before I had finished reading the thread.  My comment, however, is still very in line with what most others have written, so I’ll just leave it there.  Thanks though.

Post # 80
Member
272 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2018

Wow! Congrats! I’m sure she’ll say yes 😀 In terms of the return policy, would you engrave or resize first? Maybe wait to do these things!

Post # 81
Member
3650 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

I’d be drooling over that Tiffany ring and would grateful for my in-laws to chip in on it.

All of the points raised up thread were good ones, though. Sound like you have considered them so go ahead!

Post # 83
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee

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zl27 :  100% agreed. I HIGHLY doubt she knows the price of a ring from Tiffany’s if she’s okay with the same no-brand moisannite equivalent for literally 50k less. It sure seems wasteful to spend a fortune on someone who doesn’t even know the difference

Post # 85
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee

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adam5 :  Venom? Jealousy? Cmon now. I would certainly LOVE to have extra tens of thousands of $$$ lying around but I think its absolutely reckless to waste it on something like that when she not only wouldn’t mind non-Tiffany ring, but also a non-diamond. Spend your money how you’d like, but I highly doubt the same girl is okay with a moissy in one breath, and then in the other breath claims that Tiffany is her dream ring. Its incredibly irresponsible and frankly stupid unless you are ~RICH~ rich (which I assume isnt the case if your parents are paying). If my SO’s parents gifted him that much money and he spent it on a ring, I’d be livid. 

There’s something super off and humble braggy about this entire post.

Post # 87
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee

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adam5 :  holy crap re above.  Good news, OP, is that you got a lot of good advice on this thread especially in regards to how to protect your 30 day return window, so I think you got some benefit from posting overall.  This might be a good time to thank those who have given thoughtful advice and close this up.  I wouldn’t want to see this turn into a pile-up dumpster fire.  I know I’m not the only one who would enjoy an update after the proposal with pics. I hope she doesn’t have to wait long.  She must be so excited and antsy for that proposal to arrive.  She’s probably dancing the ant dance when you’re not looking!

Post # 88
Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee

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adam5 :  If I had a good relationship with my boyfriend’s parents, I would feel extra welcomed into their family if they helped with the ring. It’s certainly not required but a very sweet gesture! 

 

However….I would be frustrated wearing a $60k ring if we were struggling financially as a couple and weren’t able to afford a wedding, house, kids or other big financial commitments. Only you know your finances as a couple so just keep that in the back of your mind if it applies 🙂

Post # 89
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee

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adam5 :  ps I meant that you might benefit from closing this thread up for now, since you made your decision and you could do a new thread for the sake of an update after the proposal.  We’d love an update thread with pics of that gorgeous ring!

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