Post # 1
My mom lives in Florida and asked if the shower could be closer to the wedding date (like a month away) so she could come up and stay up. I was just talking to someone here at work and they said that if the shower is too close to the wedding some people might not give me anything for the actual wedding since they just gave for the shower.
So what do you think… is this chick at work crazy? Or do you think people would be that cheap? I don’t want to sound greedy… I’m just asking because I don’t really NEED anything on my registry… I’d rather get the cash at the wedding.
Post # 3
I think a month is a perfectly normal time to have your shower. Thats when I have been to most within a month, maybe two. I definitely wouldn’t think about not giving a gift at either because of their close proximity.
Post # 4
We had three showers… two were well before the wedding (3 months and 2.5 months), and one was 4 1/2 weeks before. The people who were at the first two showers tended to give gifts for both the shower and the wedding, but many of the people at the third one didn’t bring a gift to the wedding.
I don’t really think they were being cheap… they gave us very generous shower gifts and then I think they just felt like they had already taken care of it. I’m not sure if it was the proximity to the wedding or just the people who happened to be at the shower (the first two showers were 1) mostly my family, and 2) mostly my friends from college, but the third one was mostly my husband’s family and family friends).
Post # 5
The amount of gift-giving surrounding weddings just astounds me — I honestly think if I went to a shower a few weeks before a wedding and gave a generous gift, I would feel like I’d already contributed enough to this whole celebration and would probably just bring a card to the wedding. Is that horrendous etiquette?
Post # 6
I don’t think you sound greedy at all. I think a month before is fine. Don’t listen to the girl at work.
Post # 7
My shower was the day before my wedding (I was living numerous states away from the wedding and couldn’t come back more than once) and every single person that attended the shower also got us a wedding gift.
Therefore, I vote that the chick at work is crazy!
Post # 8
If it was THAT close and I was strapped for cash you’d get 2 gifts but your shower gift probably wouldn’t be anything too special (and by special I’m talking about expensive not sentimental)
Post # 9
a month out is pretty normal for the showers i’ve attended.
Post # 10
Mine was the day before!!!! It was ape sh*t crazy busy but totally worth it. It almost didnt happen so although I hated getting up at 7am after partying late at my bachelorette party the night before – I did it. I was so cramed full of all the activities you normally space out before the wedding into 24 hours it was very tiring but fun! I don’t think a month before is that bad. Be grateful for what you get!
Post # 11
I didn’t realize two gifts were expected, to me one good gift is enough to say they contributed to the day. Timing is good to me and pretty typical I thought. You may just want to make sure those not invited to the wedding are invited to the shower.
Post # 12
Thanks everyone. Like I said, I was mainly asking becuase I don’t NEED anything on my registry and if I felt like people weren’t going to give me something at the wedding because they gave me a gift, I’d get rid of the registry.