Post # 1
So kind of a complicated story, but here it goes.
I’m 23 (24 on Friday!!) and I have never met my father. I found out when I was 16ish that I had a brother and a sister (older) and started looking for them. Now, about 8 years later I have finally found them! I found my sister on Facebook and after some very tactfuly written questions I confirmed she was who I thought she was and she ended up putting all the facts together on her own and figured out that I was her half sister -she’s one smart cookie 🙂 Anyway, not only do I have a brother and a sister, but I have 3 brothers and a sister and a million nieces and nephews! Craziness! My family went from all of 8 people to like 30 in a day.
So even though I haven’t actually met her or my brothers yet (they live in NY and I live in GA) I feel very close to her already. We’ve been talking back and forth constantly for about a month now and I think I’ve decided that I want to ask her to be in my wedding. (They’re all coming down for the wedding!!)
So my issue is this: All of my BMs have ordered their dresses and they will be here in plenty of time to have alterations done and such. I really want to surprise my sister with this request to stand with us on our wedding day, but she obviously wouldn’t be wearing the same dress as the others.
Do I tactfully ask her to wear a royal blue dress to the wedding even though it won’t be the same color as the rest of the BMs?
Do I find out through a sister-in-law what size dress she wears and order one for her?
Or do I just scrap the idea all together and just be happy that the other half of my family will be there on my big day?
Post # 3
Is there another way you could honor her? Ask her to do a reading or something of that sort? You could get her a corsage to wear
Post # 4
From what you have written, it comes across that you are wanting to surprise her with this??? If you really want her to stand up with you, I think you should ask her and give her the opportunity to say yes or no. Then you can ask her her size and purchase a dress for her. If you are putting her in a different dress than everyone else, how do you think your Maid/Matron of Honor will feel about this. Traditionally, the Maid/Matron of Honor is the one in a different dress. You could always order another of the same dress that you ordered for your other bridesmaids. It may not be exactly the same color, but it would match close enough.
Post # 5
Well as far as the dress being different, all the dresses are different. I picked a color and length and let my girls pick their own style. My Maid/Matron of Honor is my cousin and I asked her if she wanted to do a yellow dress instead of blue to stand out from the rest but she decided she’d rather wear blue, so there isn’t really anything to make her stand out from the others.
I thought about asking her to bring my vial of sand in for the sand ceremony since my mom is walking me down the aisle. That is a definite alternative to asking her to be a bridesmaid…..
Post # 6
I would ask her to do a reading or something similar. I know you feel like you really know this person, but it may become awkward for her and you may not want to place that kind of pressure on a new relationship. You have many years to create joyous memories with them.