Post # 1
I’m the Maid/Matron of Honor for my sister and she’s getting married in 8 days but she hates her dress. She bought it about a years before her wedding, and felt kind if pressured by our mom to get it (our mom was just excited and thought she looked beautiful, so when my sister was hesitating at the register our mom was saying things like “just get it! It’s beautiful!!”) and she immediately regretted the purchase. I talked it out with her and she said she felt better about it. Months later when she received the dress it was too tight, so she returned it for a larger size and felt better about it. A few months ago she was really unhappy with her dress again, so we went to David’s bridal, Alfred Angelo, and another bridal shop and tried on tons of dresses, and she decided she liked hers the best of all the ones she tried on. Then, a few weeks ago she started hating her dress again. It’s kind if a mermaid style and she’s slightly pear shaped, but she’s a size 6/8 and 5’9 so she’s very thin but she just can’t see it. She has serious tunnel vision about the “flaws” she has and just keeps lookong at those parts in pictures and feeling worse and worse about herself. What can I do to help her feel beautiful??? Anytime I say anything positive she doesn’t believe me and says I’m only saying nice things because I have to, and when I try to be ridiculous and say absurd things to help her see she’s being unreasonably critical she takes that as fact. I just don’t know what to do. It makes me so sad. She just says everyone will think she’s pregnant because she looks so fat. Normally her fiancé is really great at getting her to be reasonable but I can’t go to him for this one. Help!!!!!
Post # 3
This is a tough one. As someone who has suffered from body dismorphia, when you see those things in yourself it’s almost impossible for anyone to talk you out of it. Has she tried it on with hair and make-up done? Or with her accessories? Maybe the full look will help her feel better.
If it’s any consolation, I’m a wedding photographer and I’ve never seen a bride who didn’t look absolutely stunning.
Post # 4
Just be supoportive. That’s all you can do. But it’s hard. Good luck to you and your sister.
Post # 5
@omg: I have no suggestions or advice but high-five to you for being a seriously awesome sister!
Post # 6
Is she having a hair/makeup trial? If not, maybe you could take her for one…even if it’s just a fun thing that isn’t what she’s planning to look like, it will shift the focus from the dress to how beautiful SHE is or can be.
I just noticed someone before me suggested the makeup/hair thing, too. I know that I feel a LOT better about myself when my hair and skin look their best, regardless of how I think my clothes look.
Post # 7
@omg: I agree with @Mrs_Sailor….has she already had her hair and makeup trial? It might help her to see the whole picture; hair, makeup, accesories…also, is the dress really blingy or is it simple? Maybe it would help to try and find a sparkly belt or big flower to pin onto it?
The best thing that you can do is what you’re already doing- be there for her, go to other stores with her, and keep telling her she looks beautiful! If she truly doesn’t see it, it is likely not going to be easy to get her to change her thinking.
Post # 8
@omg: She’s just in need of some serious reassurance. I would just keep telling her how great she looks in it and maybe even discuss her disappointment with her friends so they can also let her know how great she looks in it. She may also just be projecting her wedding stress onto the dress. Maybe take her out for a spa day or something to get her mind off the wedding. There’s nothing else to be done since the wedding is in 8 days.
Post # 9
Post a picture of her in her dress, then show her the replies of hundreds of strangers who say she is beautiful.
Post # 10
Really not much you can do you have done everything! you can