Post # 1
Our family has three weddings this year (mine is the last in October). Our first wedding (our nephew) is coming up on Saturday and I called my sister to ask what she’s wearing.
Let me preface this by saying, my sister has more clothes than any one person should own. She shops all the time, and has three bedrooms in her house that are filled with clothes.
She said very matter of factly, “i’m wearing a white cotton dress with a white cardigan.”
Really?? Now, my sister is not a wedding expert. She doesn’t go to many, and she apparently loves this white dress. I asked her if she could pick something else because you really shouldn’t wear white to a wedding. I don’t know my future niece very well and have no idea if she would be offended by people wearing white, but on even the slimmest chance she would, isn’t it better to just not wear white and pick one of your other 100 options to wear?
Of course, as soon as i mentioned she maybe shouldn’t wear white, my sister flipped out and has now made it her mission to absolutely wear white.
Is wearing white really as bad as I think it is? Or has wearing white as a wedding guest become okay?
Post # 3
It will look awkward for her, not you…
That’s pretty inconsiderate though!
Although I’m a bit nuttier, and I’d probably threaten to refuse my sibling entry to my wedding in all white. (Haha, don’t take that advice…)
Post # 4
Kick her. If she has so many clothes, she can find something else to wear.
Sisters…. I swear….
Post # 5
Tell your sister to call your nephew and his Fiance to run her idea by them. There are a few brides who don’t care if a guest wears white, but I sense that majority of them would flip out or at the very least get seriously annoyed.
Post # 6
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
I can remember each of the weddings I’ve been to the past five years when someone wore white, because the other ladies (self included) were rather catty about “doesn’t she know not to wear white to a wedding!”
Since your sister is wearing cotton (vs. a silk strapless, which I’ve also seen, and people thought it was a double wedding), no one’s going to confuse her with the bride, but she really should wear something else.
Post # 7
Someone can argue that “no-one will mistake her for the bride” until they’re blue in the face but I will NEVER support wedding guests wearing white or ivory. There’s just no reason for it. There are hundreds of other colors to choose from, pick something else.
Post # 8
@the_future_mrs: It IS inconsiderate! But I agree, she’ll the one who will be awkward. Really, for ONE day, you can’t pick another color? You said it’s cotton, though- at least it doesn’t sound “bridal” to me.
Post # 9
It might be a good idea to ask your nephew to see what his Fiance would think. I don’t really think the wearing white is that big of a deal as long as you aren’t wearing a white ballgown, no one will confuse you for the bride (not that I would actually do it for fear of stoning though).
Post # 10
Well, Kate Middleton’s sister wore white… (but she’s royalty so she can do anything) but since this is your wedding and your sister, I would insist she doesn’t wear white to your wedding! Come on, have some respect for the bride.
Post # 11
@MrsSaltWaterTaffy: LOL at fear of stoning! (But really, no, don’t wear white.)
Post # 12
@happyface: Kate’s sister wore white… and upstaged the bride quite a bit!! Pippa’s dress is more popular than Kate’s! That example supports why people shouldn’t wear white to a wedding.
Post # 13
OP: How annoying. Maybe try and talk to her more calmly?
Post # 14
This is when you use your tattle tale card. lol I mean it. Obviously she won’t listen to you but maybe she’ll listen to someone with more ‘wisdom’ (in her eyes at least). My brother gets like that about a lot of things.. not exactly wearing a white dress to a wedding situation but he just doesn’t know much and when I try to explain he gets stubborn. IMO I don’t think white dresses belong at a wedding unless you’re a bride… it doesn’t matter if its cotton or short or whatever…
Edit: when I say tattle tale… i mean tell you parents or someone she ‘respects’ DO NOT bring it up with the bride. like other posters have said she has enough to deal with.
Post # 15
If you already told your sister that it’s bad etiquette to wear white to a wedding, then I think you’ve done your job. Now it’s between her and the bride. I would stay out of it.
If you can’t handle that, then flip it to the mother of the groom. (I presume that is either your sister or SIL?) Let her deal with it.
Do not dump this on the bride. She has enough to worry about. It is very awkward to tell someone what to wear, especially your fiancé’s aunt who you barely know.
I had this issue with my Mother-In-Law. She wanted to wear a white dress (and insisted it was cream). It was also really ugly. So, I took her shopping and we found her a beautiful navy dress. But I know her pretty well, and we still treated her original dress like a backup as opposed to banning it entirely. She looked amazing in the navy dress, and my husband was really grateful that I took her shopping because he wanted her to look good!
Post # 16
She sounds rude and the dress sounds kind of casual unless it’s a really laid back wedding. I know people get up in arms about it and I would never do it at a friends or american wedding. I already know and expected several ladies to show up wearing white to my wedding, but it’s because of my Dad’s culture, they don’t wear dark or mourning colors, so no red, purple, black, gray. That does’t seem to be the case for your sister