- 8 years ago
- Wedding: June 2011
Ok. Here are some “quick” facts as I’d like to try and spare you all as much as I possibly can to read because it’s a long story.
– I have a sister who is 10 years older than me (she’s 33).
– She still lives @ home with my parents (we have different dads, she doesnt know who her dad is as my mom refuses to ever tell her)
– Ever since we moved to the city my parents live in now (I live in a diff city now, 1 hr away), my sis has been on a downward spiral. We moved there when I was 4 or 5, so she was 14 or 15.
– She has always been a drinker. We worked @ the same restaurant for 4 yrs and she used to chronically show up late for her 11-7 shift or not show up at all or if she did show up, she’d still be drunk. It just became the “norm” at work. No one really was surprised that she didnt show for work most of her 11-7 shifts on the weekends
– She quit that job one day, got another at another restaurant, then eventualyl quit there. Ever since then, the downwar spiral has been worse.
– She was involved in a HUGE drug bust last December. I cant remember what her charge was…it wasnt TRAFFICKING cocaine but it was someting along those lines. The justice system in Canada is a friggin joke and she got let off the hook with basically a slap on the wrist and, well, a criminal record so she cant get into the States anymore (not like she went b4 her bust either though).
– My mom just turns a blind eye towards everything my sister does. She now works in a bar until 3 am and then doesnt go to bed until 8am, sleeps all day, only to get up for her shift again at 5pm.
– She constantly brags to me about how she makes sooo much $$ in tips @ the bar..like $300-$500 a night (which in itself is suprising b/c the town they live in only has 12, 000 ppl in it) but yet she texts me bi weekly asking me to lend her some $$ (I havent lent her money in a while)
– this past summer when my gpa was dying in the hospital, we all (all my aunts, uncles, and cousins) were visiting him in the town he and my gma live in. At one point, my gma phoned us cousns who were at her house (b/c my gma basically spent every last moment with my gpa that she could and was constantly at his side in the hospital) saying that his eyes are glossy and that she was calling the reverand to come bless my gpa and that we should all come down to the hospital when the reverand gets there. I went downstairs to try to wake my sister up (who, remember, was sleeping all day cuz she doesnt go to bed until 8am…even when shes not working apparently) and she wouldnt even move hardly. I told her that our gma had called the church and was getting them to bless gpa and she wouldnt even budge. it was PATHETIC! and disgusting. she used to be so close to our grandparents. </3 so she didnt even come to the hospital but virtually all of the othe grandckids were there and all of my gparents kids were too. even though some of them travelled so far
– this morning was the last straw for me. I had spent the night at my parents house with my 2 year old daughter. My sister came home at 3 in the morning with some guy and they were sitting in her room talking/doing whatever (*barf*) until morning. at around 830 am, she came upstairs and kind of blankly stared at my daughter and i. it was soo eerie. she was leaning against the wall, just staring us down. not angrily. but just…blankly. there was no emotion there. and then my daughter started getting freaked out and my sister was just like “shhhh” in the passive/dreamy voice. it was so weird. she then went and ate hlf of a pepperoni stick (leaving the other half on the counter in the kitchen). at that point, i was getting ready to leave my parents house so my daughter and i were just getting our stuff packed up from my old bedroom in the basement of my parents house. my sisters room is right next door to my old room. so as we were just exiting my room to go upstairs, my sister starts coming down the stairs. at the last couple steps, she kinda stumbled and then just sat down on the bottom stair. she started asking melina (my daughter) if “auntie” could have a hug. but her voice is so raspy (a side effect of the drug, ive read) and so my daughter was scared. she totally had a reason to be scared. i was scared too. hah. it was just not pretty.
I dont know what to do. Because she was involved in that drug bust last year, she’s still supposed to get drug tested on occasion from the local police but, to my knowledge, they hvent done it recently.
Even immediately after her arrest last year, she was put on house arrest and only allowed to leave the house for work. But there were times, my mom told me, that she(my mom) would get up in the morning and my sister wasnt home. If the cops had ever come to her house to check on my sister to see if she was home when she was supposed to be (but wasnt), she would prob be in jail now. Its ridiculous.
Ive considered calling Crimestoppers and leaving an anoymous tip saying that the police need to drug test their people that they stopped in the drug bust last year. But Im not sure if that would be an appropriate thing to call Crimestoppers over.
Plus, to add fuel to the fire, she’s supposed to be a bridesmaid in my wedding in June. But Im terrified that shes going to be drugged up on the day and ruin it. Her & I arent really close anymore (we were for a while once i hit bar age, go figure) and Im not comfortable talking about it to her face (since she always seems like shes on sometihng anyway). But the only time shes on the computer is those wee hours of the morning after work, so I doubt she’s sober then either. But something needs to be done. I dont know where to turn. My Mom is obviously turning a blind eye towards this. My Dad (who, remember, is not my sisters father) is not impressed having her in his house. I mean, he gives her a house over her head, food to eat, etc. And I dont even think she has to pay rent. Remember, she’s 33 years old. She acts like shes 14..
Anyway. I just had to get this off my chest, mostly. It would be nice if someone had a similar story or some advice to give. I dont know where to go anymore when it comes to her.