- 12 years ago
- Wedding: July 2008
Actually, if it was my sister, I would probably suggest a double wedding. I can’t think of anything more fun than sharing one of the most special days of my life with my sister. We actually got engaged not long after the birth of her first child, and had the wedding on my niece’s birthday – complete with balloons and a birthday cake and the band playing Happy Birthday and 150 guests all singing. I don’t see why it needs to be a competitive event – and I don’t see why your sister’s good fortune and your family’s joy over that should take away at all from their joy over your wedding. But obviously my relationship with my sister is a little different than yours.
Here’s my best advice – the real craziness of wedding preparation mostly happens in the 30 days right before the wedding (or even in the two weeks right before the wedding). Really, and don’t take this personally – you’re the only one who is consumed by it day and night for months ahead of time – trust me on that. Even your sisters and mom and close friends and relatives are going to spend the vast majority of their time thinking about anything but your wedding – so they will have plenty of time to help out with your sister’s, without actually taking away from you. And by 30 days after your wedding, it will pretty much be old news to all your guests and even to your family – who will go on home the next day and get right back to their lives. So I don’t actually see how her wedding a month after yours interferes at all with your planning or execution. It does mean that your family will probably have a bit of wedding fatigue by her day – as they will have just gone through it all with you – but if anything that’s a disadvantage for her, not for you.
I agree that this is, if anything, a little hard on your guests – especially any who have to travel. But if you don’t have a lot of guests who have to travel, maybe that’s not an issue. If travel (like it does for most of my family) consists of a couple hours drive, then it’s not really an issue at all. But I agree that you’re likely to get farther, if you really want to make an issue of this, by talking about the logistics. Otherwise you just come off as not wanting to share the spotlight, which is not an attractive position to be in, and will not likely get you a lot of sympathy. If only because, as I said before, the spotlight is not really going to be on you anymore by that time anyway.