Post # 1
she is younger and just got married in july. I paid for half of her wedding and literally planned it, coordinated the whole thing, the rehersal, ordered her bm dresses on MY CC…made her cake, made her boquets and centerpieces, booked her venues, got the prices down, decorated, favors, hair, makeup, a discount on her dress, veil and alterations (bc i work in a bridal shop) hand made her invite,, did her entire shower…put it this way all the bitch had to do was show up. She made my life a living hell throughout the entire process. kept placing orders with no regard to how much more it was going to cost me. I had to deal with her white trash inlaws on a daily basis (who turned out to be quite nice just inlaw-zillas during the planning process) when it was over, she said she learned everything that goes into a wedding and assured me when i get married next year..as my sister and maitron of honor she will do everything she could to make my wedding as perfect as i made hers. Really bc i hadn’t noticed…i have bought my own invitations, my own favors and have planned my own bachlorette. why b/c she hasnt done it and i wont leave it up the the bms..its not their job. She came with me to order her dress and only brought $40 with her..i guess she still has her habit of relying on sissy to foot the bill…..um ive been engaged for 2 1/2 years..i was totally not mad that she swooped in and had a shotgun wedding before mine…nope didnt care..bc when it was mine turn i really thought she would be there.
not so much
i planned a girls night for me and the wedding party to put together the favors for the shower and the shower invitaions. bought a cake, apps, chips and stuff for martinis…imagine my dissapointment after 6 of my nine bms text me to say they cant make it last minute….i call my sister “where are you” …jen-“oh i dont want to come” julie-im sorry what” jen- oh i never said i was going to do allt his stuff like of course ill be at the wedding and bachlorette but im not hanging out with you and your friends i dint even know those girls besides, i have to go to my grandmother in laws for dinne…id rather do that”
Just like that………..EPIC FAIL AS A MAITRON OF HONOR…
i have a maid of honor as well…she is my best friends fiance…yes they decided to get married after getting wedding fever hearing my fi and i talking about our wedding..they decided they (moh to me and best man to him) despite their obligation to our wedding…are going to get married 3 months after us…guess what i dont think mine is as important anymore..in fact i know it isnt ..she was a no show as well.
Post # 3
Yeah my girls haven’t done jack shit. Its really annoying! My maid of honor bought favors (little boxes of jordan almonds) and cupcakes and acted like it broke the bank to spend $70 :/ Um I bought your dress, shoes and everything else AND spend over $200 on gifts for you… SO OBNOXIOUS! I was running around all day getting stuff for the shower because she didn’t do anything, and neither did my other bridesmaid. I bought everything and set it up, and was late because of it. Then yesterday she had the nerve to say “you better be as good of a maid of honor as I am…” So I said with an annoyed voice “Yeah, I promise to do for you exactly what you did for me” haha
I hope they step it up soon. I’m getting married this weekend and I’m so ready for this to be done!
Post # 4
It was really wonderful for you to do all those things to make your sister’s wedding a good one. Especially in terms of paying for elements of it, etc. She’s lucky to have such a generous sister and I’m sorry it seems like she might not appreciate it!
Maybe it is a regional difference, but I don’t think it’s the bridal party’s job to buy favors or invitations or anything else besides their attire? I know if I was a Maid/Matron of Honor and I was asked to buy the invites I would feel funny… it stinks that she only covered $40 of her dress, though. Wedding parties also notoriously hate being “put to work” putting together invites or favors or tulle. It’s the bride’s job and any help she gets is gravy 🙂 But they shouldn’t say they are going to come and then pull out!
Maybe your sister is just not a mature enough person to do all this the way she should. Try not to let money and participation issues ruin this special time with her. Try to enjoy sharing the experience with her… hard to do I know when you’re getting irritated.
Post # 5
@jamiemichelle: congrats on the wedding. its crazy how these girls act. my sister is seriously selfish! shes writing me lengthy emails talking about how she never planned on these get togethers with my friends and telling me when where and who to have around for her to feel comfortable enough to glue a bow on a votive…wow things have changed from her wedding when she was barking orders at me for 3 months…whtaever!
@Magdalena: yea over here there are traditions and etiquettes..ive learned them from experience but there are also some websites that help outline the duties of the maids of honor and the brides maids…im not unreasonable by any means but thats where the “maid” comes in…they are supposed to help in anyway they can. my bms and mohs are spoiled as hell..i spent prob $200 of their gifts.they got outfits shoes wedding jewelry flasks shot glasses hotel rooms you name it..the mohs got diamond earrings and a pendant. they are more then happy to help. it is totaly their job to help and they love doing it too..i could do everything myself if i wanted to but i like the bonding experience and its fun! if i did it all myself what would be the point of having bridesMAIDS you know…