(Closed) My "uniqueness" is not being taken well.

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
358 posts
Helper bee

It doesn’t seam like your venue reflects your lifestyle and if its very conservative and presigious then you will just be out of your element.  Is it too late to switch to like a favorite restaurant or bar or something where you’ll be more comfortable being you?

Post # 18
Member
3370 posts
Sugar bee

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@Miss Moxy:  Ugh! Just tell him that it’s really important to you to know that it’s not a problem to be who you are and it’s not ok for Future Mother-In-Law to tell you to change. He should understand that. I don’t get how he is ok with this.

Post # 19
Member
401 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

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@greymonkey42:  “Doing everything always the way she wants isn’t the way to start your marriage.  Eventually you’ll get bored of it and probably be filled with resentment”

completely agree with this. If you give in on these things now you are just setting the precedent for her to walk all over you in the future. Stand your ground and do you ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 22
Member
1218 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Miss Moxy:  You’re not marrying your Future Mother-In-Law. You’re marrying what sounds like a great guy who supports you and your decisions. So stuff her and do what you like with your hair! Yes, she may be conservative, but it’s not like you’re shaving the ‘f’ word into the back of your head or something. She’ll get over it, particularly if your Fiance makes it clear to her that while you both respect her and value her contributions to the wedding, ultimately it is your wedding and therefore your decision.

Post # 23
Member
4654 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Miss Moxy:  Flip it!!!

I’m gonna wear black, have pink short hair, and all kinds of weird stuff! I’ve kept most of it a secret from people for exactly this reason… I know certain folks will be tut-tutting for sure. ๐Ÿ˜› But anyone who disses you for your style on YOUR wedding day is the one who has the problem, not you!

Be you! Purple hair is awesome! Don’t let them hammer you into a mold you don’t fit, especially on a day that is supposed to be all about YOU and your groom!

Post # 24
Member
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

This is your wedding and you need to do what YOU want. It is not her wedding in any way, shape, or form. If it was something you were on the fence about, then I’d say maybe just for peace and simplicity’s sake go for a more normal color, but you said this is how you want it and how you envisioned it, so do it! I’d hate to think you didn’t feel beautiful on your wedding day or that you regretted changing your hair.

Post # 25
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee

Flip ’em. It’s your day and your fiance’s day no one elses. If you envision yourself with purple hair on your big day, there’s not many who have a right to gainsay how you want to look (yes I’m aware some women want their SO’s to have weight on that issue, I’m not one of them). So, go purple and rock out with your confidence out! When you feel fabulous your day will be fabulous and that’s all that matters in the end, you can worry about the in-laws after the honey moon ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 26
Member
2120 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - DD born 2015 DS born 2017

@Miss Moxy:  I think it’s important to set the rules early on. If you change to appease your Future Mother-In-Law now she will only make more and more demands later.. remember she will be your Mother-In-Law for a very long time. I wouldn’t be rude to her about it, but be strong that you are who you are, and you are who her son has chosen to marry.

Post # 27
Member
2776 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I dunno if anyone mentioned offbeat bride but check it out, its filled with stuff like this. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 28
Member
1406 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

All this b/c of the color of your hair??? Really? I’m sorry but you are an adult and I don’t believe in anyone dictating to you what you should and shouldn’t do. If you give in to her, she’ll believe she can do this w/anything since she’s gonna be family for a long time. Can’t wait to see your Irish wedding photos!

 

Post # 29
Member
413 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would cut sister as bridesmaid…and than just when they ask about your look and details smile and say it should be a suprise.

Post # 31
Member
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

oh that is just mean… You man is marrying you because he loves your quirkiness, it’s how you were created…. don’t compromise on who you are….. if they are embarassed that is THEIR PROBLEM…… the color of your hair should not matter if it is who you are …… I am so sorry you are having to endure that…. but I am over the top in other ways so I woud tell them all TO POUND SAND…

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