(Closed) My “walking down the aisle” situation

posted 6 years ago in Ceremony
  • poll: What to do about "down the aisle" situation
    Tell my mom to suck it up : (42 votes)
    79 %
    Have stepmom walk alone : (11 votes)
    21 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    664 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I agree with you- I like things to look unified, therefore I would want my little brother to walk step-mom down the isle.

    HOWEVER- something that I have learned during my whole wedding planning process is to PICK YOUR BATTLES.  That means if your mother will be so offended to have your little bro walk your step-mom down the isle, just let your mom have her way.  Ask your step-mom if she is alright walking down the isle alone.  Hopefully she will not haev a problem with that.

    Post # 4
    Member
    11356 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    @BrookieCookie9:  As a stepmom, I love the idea of your younger brother walking your stepmom down the aisle. However, if this is a hurtful idea to your mother, I would try to find another solution. Could one of the groomsmen seat your stepmom and then go to the back to process with the bridesmaid with whom you may have him matched (if you are having the groomsmen process in with the bridesmaids, that is.)

    Post # 5
    Member
    5662 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Ugh I haven’t even thought about this yet for mine.i think she should get over it though!

    Post # 6
    Member
    1475 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    @BrookieCookie9

    I like Brielle’s suggestion or even using a male usher if you have any…

    Hope it works out!

    Post # 7
    Member
    1736 posts
    Bumble bee

    I agree with the suggestions that to save trouble with your Mom, you might look into having one of the usher’s escort your step-mom. Save yourself the stress!

    Post # 9
    Member
    11272 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    who are your escorts?  are your groomsmen escorting?  does your younger brother have a part in the wedding? 

    your stepmom will probably be seated before your mother and the groom’s mother?  so if your younger brother is a groomsman or escort, why wouldn’t he escort her to her seat.  he is just doing his job.

    regardless, your stepmom should still be escorted by someone.

    i did.  bride’s stepmom & dad, groom’s parents, bride’s mom & stepdad.  my son escorted me.

     

    Post # 11
    Member
    513 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I can kinda equate to this story..my mother and father have been divorced 30 years and he has been re-married for 25years but mother is STILL bitter in  my case to the point that I sent out the Save the dates over 3 weeks ago now and NONE of my family have even acknowledged that they have received them and my sisters daughter has not even replied about being a bridesmaid… my father was the only one who has been supportive and accepted!!!  All because I told my mother that my fathers wife was being invited!!! 

    I have looked at it that if my mother cannot put aside her feelings for one day then really she should not be there… otherwise she is making the day about her and how her life turned out..

    However, I can also see that your mother would not like her son to walk step mom, perhaps you can ask your mother who she might suggest walks step mom thereby putting the question back in her court to answer!

    Good Luck 🙂

    Post # 13
    Member
    7902 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    Since your brothers are the ushers, they should escort ANY unescorted woman to the seat or down the aisle, including during the ceremony. Your mom is being unreasonable. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    513 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @BrookieCookie9:  Oh dear sounds like something my mother would suggest!! knowing that is not the done thing and trying to cause a stir! 

    TRY to avoid the Bridezilla moment (it did not work out too well so far for me – I lost my voice for a day after screaming at my mother because of all the nasty things she said when I told her my father was coming!!) and speak to your mother in a gentle way to ask her to see that you understand that this is a ‘difficult’ day for her seeing her daughter marry and not being able to walk together with the man that ‘made’ that daughter… BUT that this is now a time even just for ONE day for ALL families concerned to come together to celebrate two people joining together and that you have thought about it and you would like your younger brother therefore to walk step mon… it’s worth a shot at this stage – if all else fails – be a BRIDEZILLA..and do it YOUR way!!!!  lol

    Post # 15
    Member
    11356 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    I believe your mom should be the last one seated prior to the bridesmaids processing in, as it is usually the bride’s mother who is last to be seated. This will give your mother the greatest prominence.

    Even though your groomsmen will not be processing down the aisle, perhaps one of the groomsmen (the farthest away from your FH) could escort your stepmom down the aisle and then take his place at the end of the line of groomsmen? 

     

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