Post # 1
It’s taken me some time to gather myself enough to write this post. It still sometimes doesn’t seem real to me. A week before everything ended, we were taking our engagement photos. The night before he left, we picked out what STD we were going to be sending out.
I was truly blindsided. He just wasn’t ready, and couldn’t do it – even after his proposal and him taking the lead on moving our relationship along. I’m sure you’ve heard the stories of guys (or girls!) who just tweak out and leave – thats exactly what has happened. It took him some time to finally admit that is what happened – and in the middle of a devastating hurricane last October he left. I moved out of our home in January, and he moved out in March. We don’t talk anymore, and once he emailed to tell me he’s seeing someone else, I had to stop all contact. I found out he cancelled our venue two days after my 30th birthday by being reached by the venue. It has been an utter and absolute nightmare.
Things happen for a reason, they say – and I keep telling myself it will all make sense one day. Perhaps, one day, i’ll be back here again, but as of now, it’s the furthest thing I can think of. I miss my friend, I miss my boy, I miss every single thing about him. Just remember, weddings are ONE DAY. Don’t let the stress get to you, or to him. If I could, i’d have given up all the “wedding” stuff just to have my friend back. If I could do anything to have my friend back – I would.
You’ve all been so helpful to me, when I was on the boards, and I appreciate it. If any of you have questions about vendors that I had picked (We had everything booked!) i’d be more than happy to reccomend each and every one of them – they have been amazing, even with the cancellation.
Post # 3
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
I am so sorry you had to deal with this. I know the last thing you want to hear is someone else telling you it was a good thing so I will shut up on that front.
F him! Go do something selfishly for yourself. Extra points if it’s something he disliked or forbid you from doing. Go out and have fun and do it for you. Stop dwelling on this loser and what he did to you. Don’t let a cancelled wedding define you. Go out and explore and define yourself. I became a completely different person after my divorce and I truly prefer living for myself and it was that confidence that attracted my current FH.
Post # 4
Go out and enjoy being your awesome self.
Post # 5
Take some time for you and go out with your girlfriends or start a new hobby. When you least expect it, the person who deserves you will show up.
Post # 6
@kariface: I’m so sorry (hugs). How hurt you must feel. Keep this in mind: best you found out his feelings before getting married, rather than going through with the wedding under false pretenses. Divorce is more difficult than calling off a wedding. Best of luck to you. I wish you the strength to move on.
Post # 7
I’m so sorry that you had to go through all of this, but you WILL survive and be stronger for it. <3
Post # 8
@kariface: i’m sorry that you have to deal with this. it must be very painful. keep yourself busy. join some clubs, go to the gym, meet some new friends. time will heal the pain. trust me.
Post # 9
wow, very sorry to hear this…..
Take care of yourself, book a nice vacation!
Thank you for the tips, I do not want a wedding if I ever get married, vows before the justice of the peace and a small pig roast b-b-q is just find by me. I have a hard enough time just planning dinner for two….lol
Good luck, I can’t imagine what you must feel.
The fact that he is seeing someone so soon is weird.
Post # 10
I was reading an article on cheating, they claim cheating has become very rampant for new married couples as the men tend to feel regret and they want to try things out before kids get involved ect.
So yes, he did her a favor although I think he should have been more upfront before agreeing to get married.
Post # 11
@kariface: I’m so sorry to hear about this, but after you deal with the emotions of it all, you will be better for it! He’s going to see this again. You can’t do these things to people and expect your life to be smooth sailing…doesn’t happen like this. Hearing, “You dodged a bullet” can be pretty annoying, but would you want a man who thinks it’s easy to just walk away? I know it hurts…allow yourself to feel the pain and miss him when need be…but then pick yourself up and show the world the wonderful person you are. You will find a new man and a new best friend who is WORTHY of your love and lifetime commitment.
Best of luck to you.
Post # 12
thinking of you– so sorry you were hurt like this.
Enjoy like for just YOU right now; you derserve plenty of adventures and joy.
Post # 13
@kariface: hugs to you. so sorry you’re going through this. it sounds like you’re being strong, though, which is SO important. best of luck to you!
Post # 14
I’m sorry to hear this. Though there is a silver lining this happened before the wedding vs. after. Big hugs.