- 5 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
So my aunt (who is also my godmother) is in the process of a divorce that’s been a long time coming.
Her husband of 20-ish years has been emotionally, verbally, and financially abusive towards her and their 3 children for the past 5-7 years or so.
My aunt finally dropped the bomb on my uncle a few months ago and is in the process of moving out. She’s going to be living with a guy from her job – they were just friends at first but now they are kind of dating I guess.
Anyway, this new guy she’s dating (we’ll call him B) is also taking in her children when they aren’t with their dad, and he’s helped her through this whole process because when my uncle found out about her plans for divorce, he pretty much cut her off – took her cell phone, wouldn’t give her $ to fix her car so she could get to work, hacked into her email, etc.
I realize that my uncle looks like the bad guy 100% but I also know that I’m biased because my aunt is my mom’s sister so I’m kind of automatically on her side. But I also realize it takes 2 to tango and my uncle has never done anything to me personally.
So my mom tells me that when my aunt received my wedding shower invite, she asked if she could bring B. She lives 3 hours away from us and his car (with him driving) is the only way she can get here. And she said she wants to introduce him to everyone.
PLUS, my aunt said that whenever she mentions my wedding to her soon-to-be ex-husband, he gets all weepy and says he wants to go.
Again, my uncle hasn’t done anything to me personally, and I’ve known him for 20+ years, so I don’t really mind if he comes.
BUT if my aunt is there with B, I’m afraid there might be conflict.
They aren’t the kind of people to start something at anyone’s wedding but … I don’t want any tension for anyone that night.
So …. any advice?
As far as the bridal shower goes, I don’t really want B to come. I only want it to be close female friends and family. I would feel awkward with a stranger being there, especially a grown man.
But if he doesn’t come, my aunt is making it sound like she has no other way to get here.
And what about the wedding? Do I let my uncle AND my aunt come (with B)?