- 1 week ago
I got marrieeeeedddd!!!!!
– I got married to an incredible man that I love SO much. He has been awesome throughout this whole experience. He looked so handsome, he wrote some fantastic vows for me, and he gave a little speech about me at the reception. It was more than I ever thought I would have in my life and I am over the moon.
– The ceremony spot was gorgeous! We were in front of a waterfall in the middle of a national forest. The ride there was full of fall colors but at the waterfall everything was so green.
– I LOVED my dress, my cape was amazing. Everyone said I looked like a fairy princess during my bridal walk, which was over a bridge.
– We rented a mansion on a hill overlooking wine country and it was GORGEOUS. There was a double rainbow for awhile! The decor was everything I wanted – greenery, flowers, lights.
– I made two 3 layer cakes and a cheesecake, which everyone raved about. The cheesecake was gone in 5 minutes and the other cakes were almost completely devoured.
– The catering had delicious apps which we served right after my wedding. Everyone loved them and couldn’t stop talking about them.
– I made my bridal bouquet and it turned out GORGEOUS
– My family and friends helped out a lot. My sister-in-law did the flower arrangements around the mansion, my sister, mother, and sister-in-law laid the greenery and flowers on the tables. My brothers, sisters, fiance, mother, and friends helped pack everything into their car, helped unpack, washed china settings for 30 people, purchased the alcohol for me (I paid them back), set up heaters in the outdoor space, helped pack everything up and got it in the cars the next day and I didn’t have to do a THING.
– My family and best friend flew out to my state and I got to spend time with people I love so much, that I haven’t seen in a year. I got to show them around my new home and we had lots of fun sightseeing.
– I. Was. So. STRESSED! I did so much! Selecting, testing, making the cakes and frostings and fillings. Writing the ceremony which included a handfasting, the vows, rehearsing with our friend who agreed to officiate. Selecting the flowers and greenery, making the bouquet. Selecting and coordinating with the venues and the vendors. A million other details, but since everything was so DIY everyone was coming to me with questions and no one seemed to be really listening to the answers. I was constantly interrupted with what I was trying to do in order to answer more questions or do something else. I never got to take a breath, and then I felt bad because I didn’t have everything done already but there was just no time.
– I was hosting a lot of people in my home, so I was frantically cleaning, figuring out itineraries, and answer a zillion questions about how people were getting around, what we were doing, etc while also trying to get the final wedding planning details set. My family is super loud so it took me forever to write my vows because I couldn’t get away from all of the noise! I am an introvert so I was incredibly exhausted the whole time.
– I was so busy I was barely getting any sleep. I was up until 3am the night before my wedding frosting cakes (I forgot the frosting at home and my awesome fiance drove 2 hours to get it for me). The night before that I was up until 3 again getting stuff done. I don’t think I got more than 4-5 hours sleep for over a week. I was tired and stressed out.
– Some of my family went out to dinner and breakfast and I was so busy I couldn’t go out to any of it. I was sad that they went without me. I would have liked to go.
– I was super late to the ceremony. I was trying to get ready and also field a bunch of questions at the same time. And was answering questions on the way to the ceremony. I had expected family and friends to hang out with me while I was getting ready but everyone was having a good time downstairs and I was alone. Whenever anyone did come up to talk to me it was to ask questions. I had to ask for something to drink, which isn’t a big deal but they were all having a good time drinking wine and no one thought to bring me anything. I had to ask my family to drive me to the ceremony instead of putting me with someone I didn’t know that well.
– Because I was so late to the ceremony, dinner had to be pushed back and we didn’t get to have dinner at sunset. It was still lovely but it was a shame that people didn’t get to see the incredible view all throughout dinner.
– my man of honor made a speech about me that included talking about the time I got fired for calling my boss a dumbass (it sticks in people’s minds because it’s very unlike me) and my ex who was an ass. He said a lot of good things but OMG seriously? It was embarrassing.
– I did my own hair and makeup and I didn’t like how my eyes turned out, the lipstick came off right away, I thought my hair was awful. I gained 30 pounds in the past few years (and I was on the larger end of average before) and I feel like I don’t even look like myself.
– everyone is posting photos of me from the most unflattering angles. double chin, weird profiles, it’s AWFUL. I hate most of the pics people are taking of me, and now I’m so worried about the professional photos. Especially looking so much larger than I am used to.
– I am large chested and even though the dress was taken in a lot, everything started to slide around and I am worried I was showing a LOT more than I was meaning to.
So here is where I am. There are things I love about my wedding and it will always be special, but I am heartsick over the fact that I didn’t really enjoy myself. I was too stressed, exhausted, and upset. This is my first moment to myself in a week and I feel kind of depressed about the whole thing. I really didn’t want to plan a wedding because I didn’t want to feel this way, and here I am. I am really hoping that given a little more time and more sleep I will feel better about how everything happened…but if I don’t, I might do a destination vow renewal, just the two of us, in a few years.