(Closed) my “when are you having another one” rant

posted 6 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
Member
1963 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I think you have every right to be upset.  This is without a doubt one of the rudest questions someone could be asked.  I don’t think ANYONE should ask about another couple having a baby.  Very rude, and potentially hurtful (as is your case.)

Although we are not TTC yet, someone close to me had this issue (with several miscarriages) and it’s a heartbreaking experience.  I hope people wise up in the future.  I personally think you can answer with a dignified “That is personal information”, or “That’s between SO and myself”, and leave it at that.

Post # 4
Member
907 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Wow–I’d be frustrated too!  You haven’t even had your first one yet for goodness sake!  I can’t relate to that yet as we’re still in the TTC process, but I can imagine that would be annoying, especially considering the hard road you had to travel in order to get this one.    My mom told me last night that my dad told her they are never going to have grandchildren and they need to accept that. We haven’t come right out and said we’re TTC, but I  mention all the time about “when we have kids…”  so I’m not sure why he feels he’ll never have grandkids.  Anyway, I’m sorry people aren’t being very sensitve toward you. 

Post # 5
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

@panterapeach:  That’s so annoying, especially of people know about your struggles they should just let you enjoy the happiness of ONE baby, especially before it’s even born.

However, my gyno refers to pregnancy as “the ultimate reset button” so maybe #2 will be a snap, and you’ll be posting here all like “we only did it once, could I be ku!?!”. :p

Post # 6
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

Oh I feel you! But you said this: “I know this might sound weird but can’t they be happy we are blessed with at least one?  I know I am!!”

I think that’s a perfect answer to people’s question. Tell them that right now, you’re very blessed to be pregnant with your first and that’s what you’ll be focusing on. Even after you have the baby, use that and remind them that you struggled to have the first, so you don’t expect the second to be any easier. The more you put people in their place, the less they’ll ask stupid questions like these. 

Post # 7
Member
1659 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I always say something stupid like “oh I know, right? We’d have a million if we could!” and it never goes further 😉

Post # 8
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

@2PeasinaPod:  I agree with this. Something like “you know how hard it was to get pregnant this time, I can’t even think about going through it again” will hopefully keep the questions at bay

Post # 9
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

I can totally relate of course. I doubt anybody will say that to us knowing what we went through to conceive, but if they do, I’ll just simply ask them for $15,000 for our next round of IVF. I’m sure that will shut them up!!

I can’t believe people would ask you this while you are still pregnant! That’s just crazy.

I’m so excited for you!!!! 🙂

Post # 11
Member
1145 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I get asked this question all the time too and then when I reply that we’re pretty sure we’re only going to have one, 90% of the people tell me I can’t do that.  :   It’s amazing the pressures other people can put on us, especially with such a personal thing.   

 @Jenn23:  Love this reply!  lol

Post # 12
Member
1508 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

@panterapeach:  UGh. Peopele need to remove their feet from their mouths. Can’t they let you have your first baby and enjoy him or her before they are asking you about number 2.

Post # 13
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

@Jenn23:  I love the response too! 

People just plain don’t think. It’s like the people who come up to a pregnant person and say, “Wow…you’re getting big!” Thanks Captain Obvious…I hadn’t noticed. 

Post # 14
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

@panterapeach:  Diminished Ovarian Reserve can kiss our *****!  🙂   ha!

 

@chrispygal:  They tell you that you can’t do that?! Oh my gosh…that is nuts! lol

 

 

Post # 16
Member
1434 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

ooooooooooooooh Lord…..I am rubbing my forehead right now becauase this stresses me out. People can be so nosy & inconsiderate. I feel for you…..sorry love.

The topic ‘my “when are you having another one” rant’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors