(Closed) My worst nightmare! Please help!

posted 6 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
3039 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

First of all, congratulations! I think you might still be in shock, and that’s why you’re having these feelings. I’m sure it will all feel better in a few days when you’ve had some time to let it sink in.

As for losing the baby weight, fitting in your dress, getting the honeymoon you had dreamt of… I understand those things are important too. Can you postpone the wedding for a few months?

Post # 4
14659 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Wow, after trying for 2.5 years, I can’t believe that it could possibly be a nightmare.  Congrats!  You’re pregnant.. you’re going to have a baby, be a mother for a little life.  The wedding is just a day.   You say you’ve been looking forward to getting married?  Well, you’ll still be married after your wedding!  The honeymoon is just a vacation.   You can take one later.  Since you arleady have your dress, what if you did bridal shots asap, before you start to show?  What about a quick ceremony with you and your Fiance so you can get the couple shots you always envisioned and then have your celebration in Dec?

Post # 6
9139 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

Whoa, you should be looking at this as a blessing since you have had such trouble TTC with the endometriosis!  Take a deep breath, smile, you’re going to be a mommy!  Give it a few days to sink in and then worry about the wedding.  You have plenty of time to figure out if you will need a different dress after you have the baby.

You can a) postpone the wedding for a few months to give yourself time to lose some weight; b) bump up the wedding and get married before the baby is born and do the honeymoon as a babymoon before the baby is born; c) keep the wedding date you already have and find another dress (or hope you can fit back into it after the baby; it does happen and my stepsister was proof; back in her size 2 jeans within 2 months of giving birth.)

P.S. Yes, you can bring a newborn to a wedding.  It will just change your focus on the wedding day because either you or someone you trust will need to be watching the baby.

Post # 7
1583 posts
Bumble bee

@Lindsay22:  try not to stress. it isn’t good for your baby. Put your wedding out of your mind and focus on being healthy and happy so your baby makes it into this world ok.

Post # 9
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Hormones!! haha Apparently they start immediately, and I’m sure they’re playing some kind of role in this.
Now, not that I’m TTC but this is also my nightmare, So I am totally with you on this one.

You have sooo many options! So just breathe.

Yes, you can bring a baby of that age to a wedding. Not a problem. It’ll just sleep wherever you put it, so it’s really the perfect age. But you could also hire a babysitter if you really don’t want to have to worry.

As for the honeymoon, I know in my family there would be a million people offering to take the baby while we went away (my parents, my in-laws, etc) so that shouldn’t be an issue. The only potential issue is that after having baby you won’t want to leave it. 🙂

Now, for weight gain. You DO NOT have to get super fat during a pregnancy. Seek advice for your OBGYN and do not think you are “eating for two.” Eat healthy and get the nutrition you and baby need, but stay away from the junk you would never eat if you weren’t pregnant. If you do this, and then try breastfeeding (or at least pumping) you shouldn’t have trouble losing a lot of the weight afterwards. Also, make sure to exercise regularly during your pregnancy.

The other option is to postpone the wedding, like a PP mentioned. I had a friend who just did this because she ended up pregnant and her due date was only two weeks before her wedding date. If it will help you to calm down then do what you can to postpone the wedding.

MOST IMPORTANTLY: Take a couple of days to enjoy this with your FI!! Forget about what it all means, and what you have to worry about now. Just be sooo happy with your child’s future father that you are going to be parents and your dream is finally coming true!!! Everything else can wait a few days, it’s not going to make a difference. Congratulations!!


Post # 10
7647 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Congratulations, first and foremost. I think you are stressed out right now and need to take some deep breaths. I can’t imagine planning a wedding and then having a baby just a few months before, but you know what? You are a woman, and we are resilent like that 🙂

Step away from the wedding for a little while and focus on this new found joy. Don’t focus on all the negatives. Your dress will fit, and there is a lot a seamstress can do to make it fit. You don’t know how much weight you will gain, you don’t know what you body is going to do after this. It may work in your favor. If you are strong enough, you could ask your doctor about a diet plan while pregnant, so you can try to gain as little weight as possible.

If you do have a baby in October and your wedding is in December, you have enough time to lose the baby weight, but if you are still unsure I would push the wedding back or maybe take a different route and have a reception after baby comes and go to the court house or something.

It will all be ok. Congrats again!

Post # 11
3039 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Lindsay22: Well, then you’ll just have to make the best of that day – and imagine, your little baby will be there to share you wedding day! That’s amazing!


As for weight – I’ve once lost close to 70 lbs myself and I know there’s a lot you can do in a relatively short time frame. Just focus on what you eat – healthy, nutritious food, like meats, fish and vegetables. Stay away from starch and try to consult a PT to figure out when you can start to exercise again.

Post # 12
3718 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Just breathe and relax. It will be okay. You are pregnant. You got the child you wanted for so long. Ideal time, not so much, but you wouldn’t have been trying if it wasn’t wanted.

As far as the wedding, you’ll have 7 weeks. If you stay healthy (as in eat healthy, but enough food for you and your baby and work out) and then nurse the baby, you should be fine. You may have a couple pounds, but most people I know bounced back, especially if they were in shape before.


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