Here’s what it boils down to for us: I am particular about how DH’s clothing fits his body. He is particular about what the clothing feels like. For him, its all about texture, how absorbent the fabric is, is it soft, does it make him feel sweaty or hot, etc.
So we get clothing that Darling Husband likes the look and feel of, but I find the fit. Its not that hard once you find a basic outfit for each season. We call them “uniforms.” In the summer Darling Husband is usually wearing shorts and a polo shirt, and in the winter he’s usually wearing jeans, a button down shirt, and a light jacket or sweater. So its pretty basic stuff, but like anyone else, you have to make sure the fit is right. And Darling Husband always wants things that feel light, soft, and absorbent. So except for athletic stuff, we stick to natural fabrics – cotton and wool blends mostly – and I’m always looking out for thin, lightweight cotton undershirts and boxers, since comfortable underwear goes a long way in making him feel comfortable in all his clothing.
If I find something that works for both of us, I compliment him on how great he looks, and then buy 3-4 of them at once. I keep track of all of DH’s measurements, the brands of clothing that have worked in the past, and his likes/dislikes. When we go shopping together and we find something Darling Husband likes, I’ll ask him what he likes about it and note that. Sometimes he’ll say “I really like this fabric and how it feels – its not scratchy and it looks nice.” And then I’ll remember and make sure I look for it on my own at a later time. Or sometimes he’ll say “I don’t like this denim because its very heavy and it will make me feel sweaty. I like THAT denim, because its lighterweight.” And then I’ll remember to never buy that weight of denim. That makes it easier for me to find things that he may like on my own, especially when there are online sales, and it helps him feel like I’m paying attention and really care about him. He loves it when I say “I ordered you some more of those shirts you like – you know the kind with the nice cotton?”
Darling Husband used to favor wearing giant clothes too, but he got over it and feels comfortable in the more fitted clothes I find him because he knows I love the way he looks in them, and he’s realized a lot of his issues were about the feel/fabric. Here’s some other tricks that work for us:
1. Find slacks with a hidden elastic waistband. Haggar makes very well-made, nice-fitting slacks that I think look great, and Darling Husband loves them because the waist always feels comfortable and not painful or constricting.
2. Buy relaxed fitting jeans in a medium weight denim but in a darker wash – it feels looser and more comfortable to the guy, but the darker wash is slimming and makes the pant look a bit more fitted.
3. DH wears thin, white cotton undershirts that don’t constrict his neck at all, but are tight enough to fit at the chest and stomach. This helps on a few levels – the lack of constriction at the neck keeps him comfy, but the clingyness of the t-shirt wicks sweat and kinda sucks him in a little and his clothes look smoother and nicer over his body.
4. Make sure the boxers/underwear fits correctly – a lot of times guys want bigger pants bc their underwear is so big and bulky in bunches everywhere and feels uncomfortable.
Lastly, one thing I never scrimp on is his professional attire. When it comes to suits, dress shirts, dress shoes, ties, dress socks, etc, we get the best we can afford. It makes him feel important and confident, and since its an investment, he listens very carefully to what I think about the cut, color, etc. And we get everything altered/tailored so that he looks his best. Every time he puts on his suits, he feels confident and I lavish him with praise. It makes a big difference in how he see’s himself and that is what we’re going for right??