(Closed) Name Change

posted 8 years ago in Names
Post # 3
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

Me! I am having a really hard time with it. And I’m only 25! I’m really close to my dad and I was really close to my paternal grandfather (who died when I was a child). I love my crazy hard to pronounce name that people always ask about, because it is theirs. FI’s name is common and he is not close to his father at all (and neither am I). Not to mention the fact that I have two degrees in my name. 

I keep waffling about what to do. What I’ll probably do is keep my last name as a second middle name and go by MyFirst MyLast HisLast at work. 

What I’m considering doing though is keeping my name and letting people call me whatever they want. If people want to call me MyFirst HisLast in social situations that is fine, but officially I’d still be MyFirst MyLast. 

Meh, I dunno.

Post # 4
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would definitely wait until after the honeymoon to make any name changes.  Assuming you’ll be travelling directly after the wedding (or soon after) you won’t have time to get a new ID, passport, get your marriage certificate, go to the social security office, go to the DMV, wait for all those papers to come in etc.  It takes a while and just logistically you’ll need to wait.  Its normal for honeymooners to keep their name for travel documents.

Post # 5
1161 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

EEK…is your honeymoon right after the wedding?  I don’t think they will let you board unless the name on your DL/passport matches the one on your ticket  (you probably know that already…didn’t mean to stress you out more)

In the short term, you should definitely make him understand that it is risky to change your name BEFORE honeymoon.  But, obviously you all need to have a long discussion about this.  And it is hard…I’m not changing my name (I get to tell him it’s for professional reasons, so that gives me a good cop out…but honestly, I doubt I’d do it anyway), and I’m surprised at how much that seems to bother him. 

Why do things have to be so complicated?!?!

Post # 6
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I am totally dealing with the same kind of situation. I always thought I would keep my last name and hyphenate it with my fiancé’s last name. However, my fiancé is very traditional and feels strongly about me just taking his name. It wouldn’t be so bad but my fiancé’s last name is VERY VERY common and I already know two girls whose name match my would be married name.

Anyways, your situation seems tricky. I would say talk to him about it and tell him that it would be best to address the name change after the honeymoon. Ultimately (this is the advice I’ve been getting) it is your name and one you have to live with, so choose what makes you happy.

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