Post # 1
Well, it’s apparently time to get down to the name change paperwork, although after searching the boards I am comforted by the length of time that it has taken several bees and readers to change their names!
I had though that I would just add DH’s name to my own – giving me a total of four names (FirstName MiddleName MaidenName LastName). It’s actually traditional in my family, and my dad’s family is Catholic and hispanic so a whole string of names not uncommon. It also gives me the option to use both my maiden name and new last name at work, which helps quite a bit with the issue of professional "brand recognition." (I don’t really want to hyphenate. I also don’t want to lose my middle name, as it was my grandmother’s name.)
However, it really looks like a lot when I write it down! I realize that I will normally not write all four names – socially I will probably go by FirstName MiddleName LastName, and professionally by FirstName MaidenName LastName. And I suppose that anything would feel odd for a while. But I feel the need to ask: How many of you have (or intend to) be women with four names? If you’re changing your name but ending up with only three names, did you drop your maiden name, or your middle name?
Post # 3
I am going to have four names — the Fiance has four as well, and would like to give our sons four, so I thought I’d like to match. I’m planning on signing mine (unless it is a super formal signature) FirstName M(iddle Initial)M(aiden Initial) LastName.
Post # 4
I don’t have a middle name so I plan on using my maiden name as my middle name and my FI’s lastname as my last name. So, Jane Jones Smith. Socially I’ll probably go with Jane Smith but for work I really do need to keep my maiden name part of it for "brand recognition" reasons as well. So probale Jane Jones-Smith
Post # 5
i am also Hispanic and currently have four long names. my last name is hyphenated. it’s just awful.
me and my fiance are changing our names and i will then have only two names. he will go from three down to two.
i will be firstname lastname! the simplicity is too exciting.
i could write paragraphs about the problems that came with having such a long and complicated name, but will spare you and say that most of the confusion would have not happened if i had just always and i mean always used the exact same full name for every document!
good luck. four names isn’t that bad.
Post # 6
You bring up a difficult issue for me. I’m published under my last name, so its hard to give it up or even hyphenate. So far I’ve just chosen to foist off this problem until a later time and see if I ever get around to doing anything about it!
Post # 7
@ doctorgirl – that’s a big part of my issue too. I have a few colleagues who have successfully bridged the gap by using both last names for a few years after marriage (Hillary Rodham Clinton style). Eventually they generally default to using only their new last name, but if they used both names for long enough then people tend to know the new name by the time they switch. And I think they still use both names on their resumes.
I was trying to fill out the social security form today though, and they give you three distinct blanks in the name section. Too annoying. The passport form is much better – just one really long blank.
Post # 9
I have the same middle name as my mom and some day if we are blessed with a daugther, she will have the same middle name so for sure, I am dropping my maiden name and keeping the middle one. Plus his last name is way too pretty to not take!
Post # 10
I’m taking his name (steal! LOL), no configurations or questions asked. I’m getting my professional degree under my maiden name, though. I figure, the people who I actually network with will know I got married, as they’ll be at the wedding, and most jobs ask for your previous names anyway.
Although, it will make my full name (which I never use my long middle, anyway) really, really long. I’m still harboring scars from trying to put my middle name on scantrons in grade school.
Post # 11
Suzanno, I hadn’t thought about that… sort of a transition name. So do you change it to First Maiden New Last, and then change it again to First Middle New Last? or do you just change it all the way and hope the world catches up at some point?
Another issue is that if I do add his name and keep mine in any way, it will sound like such a snooty name… and yet I’m such a down to earth girl! Because my paternal grandfather was adopted, my name right now doesn’t reflect my heritage. So for that reason, I’m not that tied to it. On the other hand C.’s name definitely, definitely doesn’t reflect my heritage (even though its a cute name).
You can see why I don’t want to think about it!
Post # 12
- Wedding: October 2018 - Auberge du Soleil
@fallgirly: I have the same situation, same middle name as my mom and will pass along to any future daughter. I plan to drop my maiden name and go with First Name, Middle Name, FH Last Name.
Post # 13
I’m taking his last name, and keeping my maiden name as a second middle name. I honestly don’t know when I’ll use all 4 names, but most people I’ve talked to either regret NOT doing this, or are very happy that they did. I think it’s becoming more & more common, so no worries.
Post # 14
I will have four names as well–the name that everyone calls me is actually a nickname for my middle name. The first woman born in every generation in my mom’s family gets my first name plus whatever middle name the parents decide they like. As you can imagine this confuses almost everyone, but I feel that I can’t really get rid of my first name as it is a link to generations and generations of my mother’s family. So I will legally be First Name Middle Name Maiden Name Last Name but for all other purposes be Nickname Maiden Name Last Name.
I tried to get my Fiance to change his name in the same way, but to no avail 😛
Post # 15
I already have 4 names. First – Middle – Mom’s – Dad’s. I am just going to tag the new name onto the end for grand total of 5! This is for transition purposes so that people will still know who I am and I won’t have to change all of my pieces of identification, banking, etc. I will hopefully end up dropping one name later on (likely my Dad’s as it flows better this way).
It’s a tough call, especially in this day and age where we are all getting married after starting our careers!
Post # 16
I will be dropping my maiden name and using FI’s last name. No other fancy details to consider. I have thought that I would like to name my children FirstName MaidenName LastName. I’m not sure…