Post # 1
This may be a really stupid thing to be upset about, but I was hoping to vent and get some feedback here. Darling Husband and I are not TTC now, but we’re hoping to start trying by the end of next year. About three years ago, we started discussing baby names (we’re big planners!) and selected a name for our future first son. We have continued to debate and have not been able to agree on a second boy’s name, and we have been referring to our future son by the name we chose since 2009.
The problem? Well, I just learned that my stepsister is pregnant with a boy, due in April, and guess what she’s naming him? That’s right, the ONLY boy’s name that Darling Husband and I can agree on. The name that we’ve been calling our future son for YEARS. I’m not upset with my stepsister, as she had no idea that we had that name picked out and she is certainly free to name her baby whatever she and her husband like. However, I’m crushed, as Darling Husband and I had always dreamed about using that name and cannot seem to agree on any other boy names. Now, this could certainly be a moot point if we end up eventually having only girls, but I’m wondering if it would be terrible to use that name if we have a boy someday. My stepsister and I aren’t close at all, and only talk about once a year, usually when I wish her a happy birthday on Facebook. We live on different sides of the United States, and our future children might only meet once every few years. Would it be totally horrible to go ahead with our plans and use our dream baby boy name if we ever have a boy? We would choose a different middle name, and the boys would have different last names. I realize that we certainly have awhile to try to find a new baby name, but I’m not really sure if Darling Husband and I can find one we like half as much. Sorry for the long novel, but I was wondering what others thought about this, as I fear that my emotions might be getting in the way of my common sense. 😉
Post # 3
I think it’s perfectly fine to name your future son the same name despite it being the same name as his cousin. My second cousin (we’re a tight family but they live kind of far) named her baby my name and I see them maybe once a year and I love that she has my name!! It’s actually spelled a little differently because she’s the second Tatiana, her name is spelled Tatianna.
Post # 4
I would suggest waiting on making name decisons until you are pregnant. Lots of times your opinions on names will change once you are pregnant, and even again once you meet your baby, so why stress about something that is potentially so far in the future? You might have no boys, and then it is a moot point altogether.
Post # 5
Sometimes the name you love just won’t suit the baby either. My younger brother was unnamed for days because their boy-name didn’t end up suiting him once they’d met him.
Also – having duplicate names in a family is not that big a deal, especially if it’s a popular or traditional name (If you both decided you loved something obscure, that might be weird).
Post # 6
I don’t think it’s a problem at all to give him the same name, especially since you rarely speak or see each other. This really isn’t worth getting upset over.
Post # 7
If you’re not that close and won’t see each other much, go for it! I totally understand you though – Darling Husband and I are weird too, and have had our first son’s name picked out for…..5 years now? He told me the morning after we went to prom and had only been dating for 2 months, that he had always wanted to name his first son x.
Now his brother and SIL are due in about a month, and I actually worry what happens if they pick the same name. It seems like a silly thing, but it would be hard to find something else that we like as much – since that name just automatically makes us think of our own baby someday.
But I also agree with PP’s – your mind might change when you are pregnant or actually holding the baby. I know my mom said they went through several names during each pregnancy.
Post # 8
I have an Uncle named Patrick and a cousin name Patrick (called Pat), but they aren’t father and son. My Uncle Patrick’s sister (my Aunt) named her kid Patrick. Not confusing, don’t worry about it.
EDIT- Do you watch House (the TV Show)? There is a character that was getting a divorce but slept with his soon ex while he had a girlfirend. They both ended up pregnant at the same time and named the kids Sophia and Shophie.
Post # 9
My friend was dead set on using the name Michael. Her sister got pregnant and named her son Michael. During the pregnancy, my friend said, “well, guess there will be two Michaels in the family!” It’s not a huge problem.
But I do agree about not getting dead set on a name…your opinions could change greatly by the time you have a baby!