- 5 years ago
- Wedding: April 2014
So on the way to the grocery store this morning, my SO randomly said that when we have kids, we should name the boy after my dad and the girl after his mom. (I guess he’s assuming we’ll automatically have one of each..haha) This was COMPLETELY out of the blue for him, but I’ve actually been thinking about it a lot lately so it’s very weird.
My dad died four years ago, so for a while I’ve wanted to name our future kid after him if we have a boy. I would use his first name, James, as a middle name. I’ve never brought this up with SO, though. I figured we’re about a year off from TTC so there was no point in bringing it up until then.
I’ve also thought about the fact that we’d be naming a kid after my dad, but not SO’s parents. It’s not that I wouldn’t name a kid after them becuase of anything against them. I just personally don’t care for their names. His dad is David Ray and his mom is Carol Sue. I’m just not a huge fan of any of those names. I also wouldn’t name a kid after my mom, Rebecca Ann becuase I’m not really a fan of it either. But both his parents and my mom are all still alive (thankfully!)
He said he just knows it would mean a lot to his mom if we did and it would be nice to honor my dad. My opinion, though, is that my dad will never get to meet our kids. He won’t be there when they’re born, he won’t celebrate Christmases or birthdays with them, he won’t get to see them grow up. I know nothing is guaranteed and something could happen to his parents, but as of right now, they’ll get all of that.
I know this is not a topic that we have to work through right now, but lately my dad is on my mind with wedding planning and such. I’m thinking about who will walk me down the aisle in his place and looking at songs for SO to dance with his mom to while I will probably sit and be in tears. (I haven’t made it through a father-daughter dance without breaking down since 2009.)
So, what would you do? Name your kid a name you really don’t like to make it “fair”? Drop naming your kid something you do like and would honor someone’s memory, also out of fairness? Or something else?
Also, were you named after someone or would you name your kid(s) after someone?