Post # 32
I just heard this thing recently about having a “postpartum doula.” sounds like a great idea to me! They can help with light housework or caring for baby so you get a break, plus offer emotional support that you will probably need at that point! I have no idea what they would cost compared to a nanny.
Post # 33
@crayfish: This, exactly!
Post # 34
I wish I’d had a nanny to help out with my twins when they were born and I think this is a great idea! It’s easy to say ‘oh no, we won’t need any help’ or ‘oh I don’t want to palm my mothering duties off on someone else’ (which is a very rude thing to say) but you don’t know how much you need help until you’re the one with two screaming bundles of demands who basically need you 24/7 to make sure they don’t die. It’s incredibly stressful and you can’t ever get a real moment to yourself, which is really dehumanising sometimes. It’s great if you have family to help you, but be prepared to be told how you really should be doing everything a different way which can only add to the stress. Don’t let anybody guilt you into taking on the whole job alone. Good parents care for themselves as well as their babies. A nanny watching your baby for a couple of hours every week doesn’t make you a negligent mother.
Post # 35
@edgebee: I worked as a night nanny! It was pretty tough, but I was also a night nurse for twins. I think one or two nights a week would really help you!
Post # 36
I would take that money and get someone to cook and clean. I felt like it wasn’t taking care of the baby that was draining, but running a house, cooking meals, and still caring for the dogs is what got to be a lot harder. Luckily both my husband and mother took some time off of work.
Post # 37
hah…I didnt even want my mother or Mother-In-Law to “help” when I had my Dear Daughter. I wanted her all to myself…I get stressed out with other people here. ..and your momma-bear insticts may kick and and you might not want another person handling your baby.
Like somone else mentioned, depending on the personality of your baby, you may not evenneed help. I was blessed with a Dear Daughter who was easy-peasy for the first 4 months. I was able to do everything. Cook, clean, grocery shop…
Gosh I miss those days..haha
Post # 38
@Carlasgettingmarried: +1. I agree completely. I only had one to take care of, but my son screamed pretty much non-stop for his first 3 months. I did not take good care of myself during that time (there was no time to!), wasn’t getting any sleep, ended up with horrible PPD and really, really struggled. He was 4 months old before I really felt like my head was back above water, and I’m sad to have missed out on enjoying his newborn phase. If we have another, we have already discussed hiring a night nurse for the first month (at a minimum). I don’t feel this makes me a bad mom. I KNOW in face it will make me a better mom!
Post # 39
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
@carriejuly: I am so glad I am not the only one that thinks newborns are boring! Other than lack of sleep, I think we will be fine. Plus, I really don’t like the idea of some stranger caring for my child for the first few weeks when I want to bond with my baby one-on-one as a new mommy. Now, hiring a housekeeper to cook, clean, and do laundry sounds great!