Naughty Bridal Shower Gifts

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
580 posts
Busy bee

I have never heard of anyone receving sex toys at a bridal shower. I’ve seen lingerie, like a white lace chemise, or some panties (this was gifted to a woman who worked for a lingerie company) but nothing else. I’m sure your friends will know that your family and in-laws will be attending bridal shower, so hopefully they don’t give you anything at your shower that is ‘naughty’.

What you CAN do it open gifts from friends who you think may give you something ‘naughty’ SLOWLY. Put space between you and your guests when opening things. If you see something ‘naughty’ has been given, simply stop opening it, thank the person and move on. You have no obligation to annouce every gift you have received. See if your BMs can help you, if they will be there for the shower. Lingerie will be in a lighter box and something like a toy will still be lighter than many other things and smaller – so those are heads up for you.

You also DON’T have to open all or any of your gifts in front of others, so maybe don’t open anything. Or simply set a time limit and have all the ‘suspected’ boxes set in the back or off to the side and just have someone chime in with : It’s time for dessert and coffee/tea! or something about needing to do some other activity or end the shower.

I would really hope that your friends would be polite enough to not give you something so intimate in front of so many others. Perhaps they may end up giving you things at your bachelorette. I am sure you will be fine though!

Post # 3
Member
9123 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

the only one who gave me a naughty gift was my mother.  i was not embarassed.  she gave me something else also.  afterwards, she said she was shocked no one else gave me something.  i said it wasn’t a big deal and not something i would use.  if you get a naughty gift, just roll with it, no big deal.  don’t worry about others, you didn’t get it for yourself.

Post # 4
Member
3595 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

kiki999 :  you don’t. you trust that adults will be appropriate. and if they give you something sex-related, that reflects on them and not you. that said, you’re also adults, so if someone gives you something along those lines, just take it in stride. it’s really not a big deal.

Post # 6
Member
585 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

I’m with the PP. You don’t need to (and probably shouldn’t) tell guests not to bring naughty gifts. Just open the gifts slowly. If you get a mystery box from a friend who might give such gifts, reach into the box and feel around before you fully lift the lid. and if you see something that throws up a red flag, just laugh and say something like “uh oh I think I’m going to open this one in private.” If you think your mom might think it’s funny or cute to embarass you and try to force you to open it in front of everyone, see if you can enlist your Maid/Matron of Honor or another friend to help run interference and whisk the gift away while you move on to the next one. It’s not your fault if someone buys you something you don’t want your Future Mother-In-Law or conservative family to see. Just smile and take it in stride and it will be fine. 

Post # 8
Member
3595 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

kiki999 :  i understand – but at the same time, these women are not virgins, and you just can’t spend your life worrying about not offending anyone. so *shrug*

Post # 11
Member
3347 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

I gave a friend “sex for dummies” and highlighted the entire thing. It was a joke and I knew all the girls there. 

Post # 13
Member
3595 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

kiki999 :  whoa, there. I never called it frivolous and was trying to give you advice. I don’t understand the sudden hostility here…. I was just saying that you can’t control other people, hope for the best that they’ll make considerate choices, and then remember at the end of the day that if something does happen, that that’s on them not you (and continue to remember that if your relatives get offended or mad at you). Basically, you can’t control other people – all you can control is yourself. 

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