(Closed) Near perfect relationships, tell me about them!

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

me & my husband are the same way. We never fight, love hanging out with each other and snuggle the crap out of each other everyday. we’ve been together for almost 8 years and married almost a year ago. All of our friends compare every relationship they have to ours as their standard, its pretty awesome. Laughing

Post # 4
Member
1124 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

My fiance and I have been together 3 years now and have a very wonderful relationship.

We do argue though, from time to time. But it is NEVER name calling, putting the other one down or anything of the sort. We don’t storm off and it’s always settled in a matter of hours at the most. We don’t yell either, we did in the beginning when we were both drinking but since that time we have calmed drastically. I might cry and sometimes he will as well when we realize we have been doing something to hurt the other person and didn’t know it before but we never make the other person feel bad, they are just deep discussions about things we are feeling bad about.

We flow very well, get along wonderfully. Our arguments are so far and few we just naturally get along. 

We have a lot of chemistry and passion as well. We are very loving toward the other and everything just flows with us. Many people have said they were envious of our relationship and wish they had one like ours. Many people have tried to take us from the other (and I’m assuming this is because of our relationship and they think they can have that with the other) but none the less we prevailed.

We have gone through the wedding vows already

For better or for worse: We’ve both had our share. He was pretty crazy in his drinking days. Sober we were great but when he was drinking he would hit things and get all mad at me over little things saying “Let me live my life!”. We stuck it out though and he stopped drinking on his own. I’ve also has my worse times with jealousy (past insecurities) that I’ve worked through. We have our troubles but we work on them dilligently and we continue to build eachother up.

For richer or for poorer : We’ve gone through terrible poor times, made a bad decision to move a few states away, I got bad social anxiety and quit my job, took my fiance a while to find a job. I lost my license so I couldn’t drive and my brother moved in with us. We were so broke we were eating ramen every single night and eventually our water got cut off. We couldn’t afford to have it cut back on so we had to shower at friends. Our lights got cut off and our neighbors bugs moved in. At that point we moved back home and for a while in with his grandmother. We got our own place shortly after that. But despite the money troubles we prevailed. Right now we are blessed to be comfortable thanks to his job.

In sickness and in health: We have been through a rollercoaster of health issues these last two years. I started having seizures, without every having them before. I didn’t have medical so I couldn’t find out why I was having them. Because of the uncertainty I started getting horrible anxiety. The worst of my entire life. I would wake up all hours of the night shaking uncontrollably. My fiance would wake up and roll over and give me a back massage (which always seemed to calm my anxiety) he would do this all throughout the night. I was afraid to be alone. I was afraid to sleep, afraid to be awake. Afraid of every single thing and my fiance was there stroking my hair calming me down. He sat with me during every hospital visit not wanting to leave my side and had to call in to work so he could be there. He’s got a super great immune system so he hasn’t been sick but if he were to ever get sick I’d be by his side the whole time in a heart beat.

Hes my best friend and while we both have traits about eachother that drive us bonkers, we laugh about it. Like my fiance with his ADD. I’ll be discussing wedding things and getting all serious and suddenly he’s saying “Have you heard the new song by Avenge Sevenfold?” instead of getting mad, I accept him for who he is and laugh about it. We are all flawed

Post # 5
Member
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@MrsJenBee:  We’ve been together 3 years and are pretty much the same way.

We don’t argue, I get PMS bitchy sometime and he pretends its not there.

Post # 6
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

 @MrsJenBee: We have been together for 7 years and have maybe had 3 major fights. We bicker every now and then and disagree on things, but I see nothing wrong with it. Disagreement is a good thing in some cases because it means that you have your own opinion and do not cave into other’s desires if you have an opposing thought. I don’t think full blown fights are good, but I think discourse and disagreement are a good, healthy thing for a relationship. Besides, I would be very bored if I dated someone who always agreed with me and had the exact same thoughts…I don’t want to date myself.

Also, this article is very telling……http://thestir.cafemom.com/love_sex/131148/couples_who_fight_have_better

 

Post # 7
Member
1541 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I’ve been with SO almost 6 years. I love him more than anything. We argue, but we don’t really “fight.”

He makes me laugh all the time and we always sing random stupid lyrics we’ve remixed from others songs to make eachother laugh.

As kris325 said about her Fiance, before I started dating SO, I had developed really bad anxiety. He has helped me overcome so much of it, and he’s always there for me if I need him.

Overall, we can sometimes drive eachother nuts, but I’m also nuts about him

Post # 8
Member
3053 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

My SO & I are going on 2 years (which isn’t much in the long run so the dynamic may change a bit though I doubt it) & we don’t fight…we bicker a bit & sometimes get annoyed with one another over stupid shit but for the most part we’re really just go with the flow type of people. We had one BIG thing…it wasn’t a fight at all but more of a “I don’t know whether I want to be in a relationship at all and whether we should be together or not” about 5 months in but that was it. Thank GOD we didn’t break up then. I’m a bit a LOT too emotional to never argue or at least bicker sometimes lol

Post # 9
Member
9209 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

Well we don’t have 25 years together, but we do have exactly half that – 12.5 years – and I can say we’re more in love than ever. We have definitely had some rough patches where we bickered a lot or life just through some serious shit our way, but that has all just made our connection stronger. We tell each other we love each other, snuggle, and laugh constantly. And maybe more importantly, we know that the other has seen our worst times and deepest fears and we’ve sobbed in each other’s arms – and that has really just strengthened the trust and comfort we find in each other. God that’s cheesy, but you asked for it… 🙂

Post # 10
Member
1722 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Fiance and I are great together.  It’s weird because he is such a sarcastic asshole most of the time but I quickly learned that I love that about him, it keeps me on my toes and makes me laugh.  If we start to get on eachother’s nerves then we just say “hey right now isn’t the time, you need to be sweet and just cuddle with me” and we imediatly stop our annoying behavior.  If we have a disagreement, we each say our peice, occasionally we get loud but we have never had a “fight” last more than 20 minutes and we quickly go back to our goofy selves, usually making fun our disagreement because usually it stems from one of us forgetting something or not thinking something through.  We also really balance each other out, he’s very laid back and go with the flow and I’m high strung and get stressed easily.  He tells me when I need to calm down and helps me get passed my stress.  We also have very open communication, if something is bothering us it is brought up right away and we find a way to fix it together. 

He knows me better than anyone, I say I want three scoops of icecream and he brings me two because he saw me eat more at dinner, I’m usually stuffed after two.  He knows when to let me cry about things and when it will be better to make me laugh instead.  He knows my cycle and that I am extremely emotional the week before my period so he makes sure to be extra sweet and always gives me a full body, very relaxing massage that week 🙂  I don’t even have to ask for it, he just grabs the lotion and I know its my special time.

We get along great and we do our best to keep open communication and we work really hard to make each other happy.  We understand each other because we grew up together and saw each other through some very hard time.  We’ve only been together 4 years but I really cannot wait for the next 50 because I know they will be awesome because I will be with a man who loves me so much and wants me to happy.

Post # 11
Member
1210 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2025

Okay, I won’t lie, when my SO and I first started dating, we were very unsure around each other, and we had a lot of issues, becaue this was the first serious relationship for the both of us.

But, we don’t do the whole screaming match fight thing–never have.

And now? Super smooth sailing. Even though we’re complete opposites in personality, we have lots of similar interests, and we just click together really well. (We are also both super huge nerds and that plays a big part in our relationship, hehe.) I’m a very type A person and the take charge type, and he is very laid back and goes with the flow of things. You would think that would drive us crazy, but it works out surprisingly well. He keeps me calm and I keep him on his toes basically, lol.

We’ll have been together 4 1/2 years next month. And a proposal is coming soon, in the next few months, and we both can’t be happier about it. (And yes, I did pick the ring. I e-mailed him a link and said,”I want this one!” Hahaha.)

Post # 12
Member
1376 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’m happy to see this thread. S/O and I have been dating for about 18 months. We do have a near-perfect relationship, despite the struggles of being an intercultural relationship and being LD for a lot of it. This is by far the most serious relationship I’ve had and lately I’ve been feeling like I’m on pins and needles waiting for the honeymoon period to end or for him to lose interest or basically anything that would basically blow this relationship out of the water, because geez it’s so easy and natural there HAS to be a catch, right? Thanks for reassuring me that sometimes it’s just that you really do fit that well together and there’s no shadows lurking in the background waiting to trip you up.

Post # 15
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Awe I love this.

I think new Fiance and I fit this mold pretty well. We’ve only been dating 17 months (engaged less than a month now), but in that time things have been pretty seemless. Not to say effortless – it does take work: communication, honesty, trust, respect.

We don’t fight. I think that has a lot to do with our past relationships. He was in a relationship where his ex would bate him into arguments and he hated it, and hated the fighting. I was in a relationship where I was treated badly and I should have opened my mouth more. So we were very open, very honest from the very beginning and that communication has been vital. Like I said, we don’t fight, hardly argue about anything. At most, I get a bit *itchy when I don’t eat and I’m getting hungry (he knows this very well) and I’ll say something slightly snarky. He knows this so he doesn’t bate. He just let’s it go and it’s gone in a minute. (So patient, my sweet FI). We both hate yelling.

We don’t agree on every single thing and we have some different interests. But for the most part, we’d rather be spending time together no matter what we do. We’re both VERY easy going. And he said the other day that was something he would have always wanted – an easy going girl. And I wanted someone who was patient – with me, with my anxiety, with everything. And I got that, more than I could have ever hoped for.

The first night we met, he said he felt so comfortable with me. He has since said he cannot believe he was so bold to say that on the first date, but I felt the same and it’s taken us through this journey. We’re compatible, comfortable, and have a deep strong love. He’s my best friend. Sometimes we’re just cuddling together and it feels as natural as if we were one person, not knowing where one ends and the other begins. If that makes any sense.

I’m not naive enough to believe we’ll never have a fight or that we’ll never run into less than perfect times, but we just are so compatible that I don’t see it being often. And even if we do run into those times I trust that our love, trust, and communication will get us through. There have been no secrets, just honesty and love.

Post # 16
Member
4313 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

No, we are not perfect and our relationship isn’t either.  I won’t ever pretend it is at all.  In fact, I get annoyed when people assume that about us.  The difference is we keep our shit private.  And half the time you see a post on here “complaining” it’s either real crazy, or a small snippet out of someone’s lives.  You really cannot judge their whole relationship on one bad post.

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