(Closed) Need Advice!

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
1765 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I would nip it in the bud right away and if they do say it, the first time it happens I’d say “Well, we’ll know when the right moment is. Now ________ (comment about expecting/baby/what’s for dinner here)”

Post # 4
41 posts
  • Wedding: July 2010

i think a lot of it depends on your personality type as well as how comfortable you are with the various people.  personally i think i would either grin and bear it…sometimes those awkward comments and moments go hand in hand with the preengagement period.  or, you could try a little humor.  if S feels like running his mouth you could respond, “yeah, it would have been the perfect time…until you butted in and ruined the moment with another one of those comments!”  that way you are addressing your discomfort but in a lighthearted way.  if he doesn’t get it and does it again at another time then you could be more direct and simply say, “enough.  jokes old.”  i would definitely try to avoid getting worked up or obviously upset as that will only elevate the tension and add stress to your boyfriend.  good luck!

Post # 5
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’m not good at giving advice on how to respond to those comments so hopefully some other bee’s can make suggestions. But I will say that as annoying as those comments are, you should try your best to take them as a compliment. Imagine being in a situation where your friends didn’t say those things to you and Boyfriend or Best Friend because they didn’t think you were a good match for each other or shouldn’t get married for some reason. There are people in this situation, believe me! And it is worse than dealing with annoying comments about getting engaged.

It only took FH and I 1.5 years from our first date to get engaged and we got comments all the time from people. It was so annoying! I was so frustrated that people would even pry like that and assume we wanted to get engaged I mean it’s not like we had been together for years and years and refused to pull the trigger. Plus as the girl, for the most part, you’re just waiting for Boyfriend or Best Friend to propose so why make those comments to the girl in the first place?? But looking back, I’m glad people saw us as a compatible couple who should take the next step.

Post # 6
829 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Wow! Im sorry but this is just weird to me. Why would they be saying that stuff? My friends kept it a secret from me and acted like nothing and never said a word EVER. Just really weird they would be teasing like that… i wish i had advice for you. All i can say is maybe pull them aside? Tell them how you feel… or maybe talk to him about it and he can fore warn them.. i really have no idea. I have never heard of such a thing. I really wish you lots of luck!!!!!

Post # 7
4023 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

At the first remark, calmly say something to the point of, it will happen when we are ready, then change the subject. (yes, regardless of the fact that you are ready!!!!) If you don’t show any emotion to it, like joking with it or something, they should realize that you don’t want to talk about it, and its not fun to joke about.

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