(Closed) Need advice

posted 4 years ago in TTC
Post # 2
Member
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

You could compromise and wait one year. If he wants to wait until you have the cars paid off and the debt gone and his number is two years, then why not start trying in say 15 months? Then by the time you had the baby the debt and cars would be paid. So he gets the 2 years until you birth your child, but you don’t have to wait 2 years to just start trying. 

 

Post # 4
Member
1122 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

babyfever2015:  I had to wait a year and I’m 29. I’m glad we waited and had the time to enjoy our marriage. Now my husband feels ready and I wouldn’t want him to try when he’s not 100% there. 

Post # 5
Member
1188 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I think it’s smart to pay off debt before having kids, honestly.  Not including the mortgage maybe, but debt on depreciating assets.  I say this because kids are born every day with special needs that surpass what even the best insurance covers.  Pregnant women have difficulties and have to quit their jobs or struggle with complications.  

I’m sad that you said it’s “his way, like always”… is this just one of many things that he refuses to compromise on?  What if you agreed to $x in the bank in case of “what ifs”? Or maybe talk more about what he needs to feel financially secure.  Some people don’t really care if they’re in debt.  Other people get anxiety over it.  

Post # 6
Member
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

babyfever2015:  I agree that clearing up debt it a good idea, but something will always pop up. I would ask him what he would like to focus on most and come to a compromise–like starting after the car is paid off or if CC is more important working on getting that out of the way first. You are going to need to learn to compromise as parents so time to start now 🙂

Post # 7
Member
5 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2009

We had our first daughter at age 20, then our second daughter at age 22, and our 3 yr old son at age 26. Me and the hubby are both 29 now, and had a scare with my iud coming out so who knows, we may have one last little one in the works. I’m also a full time nursing student, and I work at a hospital. Id say its nice that hes trying to make sure you guys are financially prepared, but at the same time, I believe that having children doesnt stop you from doing the things you want/need to do in life. You guys will still get your debt paid down, and pay your car off regardless if you have a new lil member added to the family or not. Hopefully he’ll come to some sort of compromise though. 

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