- 6 years ago
- Wedding: June 2012
So the other day my sister asked me for my MOH’s address. As in, her street address. I gave it to her, thinking “what could she possibly need that for?” until it occurred to me … she may be planning a bridal shower and needs to send Maid/Matron of Honor an invite. A bridal shower that I do not want.
Before the calls of ‘brat’ begin to fly, hear me out. My Fiance and I live on the other side of the country, but we are getting married in my hometown. This is where the shower would be, if there is one in the works. We are only flying out there six days before the wedding, and during those six days we have twenty million things to do. We have to meet with vendors we’ve never spoken to and see the venue in person for the first time (my family has been handling all of us up until now). There are several DIY projects that can’t be completed until we get there. My Maid/Matron of Honor and her boyfriend, a Groomsmen, will be in town with us the entire time and they’ve never been to that city, so I wanted to make sure to take them downtown and show them around.
In short, there is NO TIME in that six-day schedule to spend several hours sitting at a luncheon in a pretty sundress eating finger sandwiches.
Add to that the fact that none of my friends live out there, so it would only be family friends that I’m not close with at all, and it sounds like a recipe for disaster. I will be sitting there awkwardly with a bunch of ladies I hardly know, staring at my watch and waiting for it to be over so I can get back to the fifteen zillion things I have to do.
Of course I appreciate that my sister would want to do this for me. I really do. But I’m sort if in an “I appreciate the thought but please don’t actually do it” sort of place. So what do I do? Do I let on through my mom that if that’s what’s planned, maybe it should be unplanned? I wonder if my sis is only doing this because she feels obligated, since she got a nice shower before her wedding so she thinks she owes it to me to do the same for me. I want her to know that she doesn’t owe me anything of the sort.
I also hate surprises with a passion. I like to plan my time, especially when I only have such a short time to do so much, so if there’s a shower I at least want to know when it is. Is there a gracious way to say “please don’t” or at least “keep it short”? Or do I just suck it up and try to fit six days’ worth of headless-chicken into less time so that everyone feels good about themselves?
I find myself wishing my sister knew how much I hate surprises. Then she would have told me straight up a while ago and I could have said thanks but no thanks. Hrmm. At this point, the thought of losing several hours of that hectic week is just stressing me out even more.