(Closed) Need Advice… I want to invite you, but I cant :-(

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
6597 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

If you think that some of your family is going to decline the invitation anyway and we are only talking about one couple. Why don’t you invite them anyway and hope for the best! I am assuming that you will get at least 1 couple that will say No!

Post # 4
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@destiny1120: I waited until my family declined and then invited some of my new coworkers. They basically knew they were B-listed because of circumstances, but they understood that I had just met them and the Save-The-Date Cards went out half a year before I met them.

Post # 5
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Make a B-list 🙂

If all else fails – have a separate gathering like a BBQ to celebrate with the new buddies that you couldn’t invite for the big day.

Post # 6
2584 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I personally would have to say that if you sent out Save-The-Date Cards to them, you really should invite them. Do you expect that some family will decline? How big is your guest list without this group of people, and how big would it be if you included them?

Post # 8
2126 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I ran into the same issue as a rookie bride. =( I sent STD’s and made a few verbal promises I wish I hadn’t and was pressured into inviting the entire family of one of my bridesmaids.  I’m sucking it up though, just might have to cut back on acquantances, co-workers, friends of friends who did not get an STD or any type of verbal indication. i don’t think I have the guts to tell anyone they aren’t invited anymore. 

Post # 9
3267 posts
Sugar bee

@destiny1120: You are asking an etiquette question and the answer is that it is not acceptable to have a B list.  All of your guests should be treated the same.

You are also stuck with everyone you sent an STD to.  They have already been invited.  If you aren’t that close to them, then they may decline anyway.


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