(Closed) Need advice on 30th birthday gift for friend!

posted 2 months ago in Gifts and Registries
  • poll: How much should I spend on this gift?

    under $20 (e.g. a book, bottle of wine, etc.)

    $20-$30 (e.g. a book + bottle of wine or multiple smaller gifts)

    over $30 (e.g. spa gift certificate, skincare box, etc.)

    other (no gift, other - explain in a comment plz!)

  • Post # 31
    14145 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    View original reply
    @fromatoz:  So it’s OK to be inconsiderate?  In my experience people really don’t like to have their money spent for them. But now this really is derailing so I’m out. 

    Post # 32
    464 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2022

    View original reply
    @catspajamas_beesknees:  my friends and i are not gifty ppl and dont really buy each other physical gifts anymore. (31 years old) i would 100% not buy a gift after spending so much for the weekend. i would write her a nice card honestly and call it a day. my best friends and i get together for girls trips generally every 2-3 months and we all spend money on the trips and have a blast and it would be expensive and over the top to have to buy gifts for all of their bdays, xmas etc. so we don’t and consider our time together to be the “gift” but clearly your friends group is different so i would def do something sentimental and cheap in that case (but idk you also brought the dessert which i would consider a “gift” as well – you’ve really gone above and beyond and i wouldn’t do any more if i were you and i think it would be really weird, immature, and selfish to expect gifts if i were your friend)

    Post # 33
    753 posts
    Busy bee

    Oh I don’t think the trip is INCONSIDERATE. You can just decline the invitation if you can’t afford it, don’t have the time etc. It sounds like a great excuse for a weekend away!

    I just don’t think an additional gift is necessary. 

    Post # 34
    3113 posts
    Sugar bee

    What is typical gifting behavior in your circle of friends, and with this specific friend?  Not just price range but.. what kind of things do you all give as gifts?  How do you think she would feel about a “sentimental” gift like the spotify playlist?  Is it a deviation from the norm? Is she sentimental?  

    I can tell you that in this sort of circumstances, I would probably spend a similar amount fo what she spent on my last birthday gift.. possibly a bit more, as 30 is a milestone birthday for many (what my brother calls an “odometer birthday”).  I also tend to gift splurge-worthy, luxury type items unless I know someone specifically would prefer a needed/practical item. (My recently married, 22 year old niece who is trying to set up her first apartment, for example, would liklely prefer receiving something from her wedding registry that went unpicked, to an expensive bottle of alcohol.)

    I have mixed feelings about the trip. You certainly could have declined the invite, it wasn’t mandatory or a royal summons.  I wouldn’t view it as a gift, but I can see how you might have felt saying no was not an option and there are some costs associated.  

    Post # 35
    5464 posts
    Bee Keeper

    Give her a nice bottle of Veuve Cliquot or Mumm champagne. Both excellent, neither over $50.

    Post # 36
    6176 posts
    Bee Keeper

    View original reply
    @Janiceking:  I missed this part  I’m sorry about your cat OP

     I’d be so sad!  

    Post # 37
    2290 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    @weddingmaven:  She could have opted out, she chose to go. In the words of WB– it isn’t a summons. She can use her big girl voice to say if it doesn’t work for her. 

    The topic ‘Need advice on 30th birthday gift for friend!’ is closed to new replies.

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