Post # 1
I am 23 turning 24 in the fall. My soon to be fiance will be 29 in the fall. In the last year I decided to pursue a different major. I now have a degree in psychology and the second major I am pursuing is to become a registered dietitian. My guy is just going back to school in the fall for a bachelors degree. I’m thinking about 4-5 years as he is doing this online and working full time. Im guessing it could take up to 4-5 more years to finish and be registered. This includes a more than likely unpaid internship of about 10 months to a year.
Thing is my guy doesn’t want to be too old before we have kids which I completely understand. I want kids as well.
I had always assumed I would be out of school. My guy said well why can’t we have a child while you’re in school. I’m not quite sure how I think about it. I know that I will want one sooner rather than later and my guy doesn’t want to be in his mid-30s before we start.
My question is, if I was in my last year of school preparing for an internship *fingers crossed* I am able to get in right away, is it unreasonable to think we could have a child at this time?
Post # 3
You mean before you start the internship? I’m not sure I would do that. Honestly I wouldn’t start trying until one of you is settled into a permanent position (which sounds like it would be you first). I know internships in nutrition are a bit different because it’s part of the track to be a registered dietician, so maybe I am wrong, but I would hope that somewhere you intern that you may have a chance to get hired there, so I would probably wait until after the internship and when you have a full dietician position. That way you don’t have to worry about facing hiring discrimination while pregnant or if they just know you have kids.
Post # 4
@ChemistryBride: I guess to clarify at anytime in the process. Having a child while obtaining the degree and having a one year old while interning or during the intern process. Also we talked about how long into mine starting a new job we should wait to start trying. I don’t want to be waiting around but I want to be smart.
The second part I am concerned with is what you were saying, the discrimination being pregnant.
That internship component is screwing me up if it wasn’t for that I would have a lot less of a concern of having a child while in school.
Anyone else have any advice?
Post # 5
@mjax: No. I think your SO underestimates just how much time a baby takes up.
Post # 6
I personally wouldn’t have a child until both you and your fi are settled in full time positions. Children take up a lot of time and are very expensive.
Post # 7
mjax Internships are usually the last thing you do before graduation, and the guidelines are usally strict as far as absences, being late, etc. They can also be stressful, especially with you being so close to graduation. I don’t think it would be a good idea, babies are a lot of work. It can be done but won’t be easy, I had a friend who had a child and once she became pregnant she missed classes because of health reason, and had to sit out a semester, her last semester. She wanted to go back but the healing process didn’t allow her to go back as soon as she would have liked. Don’t worry about the age, it’s better to do everything you need to do first so that you can provide the best sistiuation for the baby.
Post # 8
How would you be financially with you in a low paid or unpaid internship, just out of school and him working full time and paying for school as well? That sounds like a lot of money out on only one income.
Also, if he is both working and schooling, how much time does he have to help with the kid?
Think of the home life/financial logistics of this as well.
Post # 9
I wouldn’t do it.
Is a year or two really doing to make much difference if you wait? Because I feel that it will make a huge difference if you jump in too soon.