Post # 1
So my FMIL is being a bit undecided about her dress for the wedding, and we’d like to come up with some suggestions for her.
She’s thrown everything out there – buy a new dress, get a dress made, wear a dress she already owns.
I want both of our moms to look glamourous! So I’m a little opposed to the get a dress made/wear an old dress route. My fiance is worried she’ll wait too long to go to the seamstress.
FI sort of had it today when she showed us a dress (stuffed in her closet for years) she had thought she could wear… until I pointed out that it was very much a long, white gown.
My fiance just had this bug-eyed look of horror on his face when he saw it and told me later he’s going to assign his sister to get-mom-an-appropriate-dress duty.
So I was wondering if anyone has some good suggestions?
I feel like there must be some bees who looked into this (I am not a shopper!)
I was thinking I could send some to my FSIL as ideas or at least starting points.
She’s about 4′-11″ and apple-shaped.
She prefers flared skirts and dresses, which do look good on her.
I’d like her in a dark color (preferably navy) because it will flatter her figure better than a lighter color.
I’m looking too, but I am a little lost on what would look good on her.
Post # 3
Maybe you can make a day of it and go shopping with her, so she has an idea of what you expect. Also, tradition dictates that the MOB buys her dress first, then tells MOG the color/style/formality so she can match. If your mom gets a dress first, perhaps that will give your FMIL some ideas.
Look online at gowns (Nordstrom’s has a MOB section that could also work for MOG), or at a store like David’s.
But, in all honestly, give her guidelines (length, color, formality) and let her pick her own from there. She has plenty of time, so no need for this to be a stressor for you yet.
Post # 4
@abbie017: My mom’s planning to rent a dress, and I’ve asked her to stick with navy blue-ish. I have no idea what she’s picking out (she’d going to try a few on soon), but I can gather the formality and length of it (apart from the color)
FI and I were saying that we’re maybe being a little too “nice” (or lax) lately because we have so much on our plates, and maybe we should give her guidelines to help her narrow down her options.
I’d rather assign FSIL to go shopping with her, since I don’t “get” her preferred style and we often differ on fashion. I trust my FSIL to help her out better than I can.
I’m actually not really that stressed… my fiance is.
The white dress thing alarmed him, and I can’t seem to convince him it’s OK. 🙂
Post # 5
I’m a 4 time MOB (well, DD #4 gets married next Summer). I have to be honest here – why are you worrying about this? None of my girls had any input on what I wore to their weddings and #4 won’t either. I have been dressing myself for a long time and I’ve got this.
I do understand that she seems to be a bit discombulated here but let it go! Ask your FSIL to help her find a dress and take it off your plate. There are plenty of things you will need to worry about but this isn’t one of them.
I also have to put this out there – I truly hate the “MOB buys first, MOG coordinates” tradition. This comes from the day when a MOB planned her DD’s wedding, it was her magnum opus in the world of society and was a make it or break it as to whether she was the uber hostess of the universe. The bride and groom were lucky to be invited, it was MOB’s shindig. Since she was the Queen Bee (no pun intended) MOG waited til MOB bought her dress, then purchased hers and kept her mouth shut.
I have incredible regard for all of my DDs’ MIL’s and could never treat them so disrespectfully. I never coordinated with the Brides or the MOGs and all of my DDs have beautiful wedding pictures.
I really encourage you to ask FSIL for help and let it go.
Post # 6
I got asked what I wanted them to wear by both my own mother and my fiance’s mother. Honestly, I care that they love what they’re wearing. That’s it. But in a push, I started pinning a ton of suggestions of things that I think would be lovely.