Post # 1
So we are having an open-bar at our reception and its pretty much a non-traditional, big ole party.
We really don’t want a lot of kids there, not to be rude, but because people will be drinking & getting roudy (and knowing my fiance’s friends – probably alot).
I don’t want to offend anyone and decided not to make this a “rule” so I didn’t include it on the invitations. I did put our wedding website on the invites and asked everyone to check it out for the details/directions, etc.
On the website I would like to include something encouraging parents to leave the kids at home. Need help with the wording…
Here are some phrases I came up with. Let me know (honestly) what you think and which one you like best (or if I should just forget the idea all together).
1. Please join us at the reception for our very first “date night” as a married couple. There will be plenty of food and an open-bar so we encourage all of you to make this a “date night” for yourself as well.
2. After the ceremony, we will celebrate this awesome occasion with all of you at an immediate reception in the XXXX building. Children are invited but please keep in mind that we will be having an open bar.
3. Please join us at the reception for some mojitos, sangria, coronas and of course, single call drinks. Keep in mind that we will have an open-bar so be sure to plan accordingly.
To me, an evening wedding (ceremony is at 6pm/sundown) and the words “open-bar” automatically mean that I shouldn’t bring any kids but I know that not everyone interprets that the same way.
What do you think? Like any of the 3? Have any other suggestions?
Any advise is appreciated.
Post # 3
Wait so you are inviting the kids but just don’t prefer people bring them? Because you could just not invite them…wording invites Mr. & Mrs Joe Sample. If you are ok with people bringing kids but prefer they don’t then I wouldn’t say thinks like make sure you plan accordingly. I would just go with the first parts so it sounds not kid friendly without saying it.
Something like: Please join us for our first date night as a married couplle with dinner, drinks and dancing the night away.
Post # 4
After all of the information on our invitation was stated this is what we put:
Strolling Reception and Merriment Immediately Following Ceremony
And in a slightly smaller font directly underneath we put:
Adults Only Please
Simple and to the point. I don’t think you really need to draw it out as you did in your examples.
Post # 5
i would just write “adults only please” on your website. your options don’t get right to the point, and open bar for me doesn’t automatically signal no kids.
on your rsvp cards, use the “__ out of __ are attending” where you fill in the second blank. that way people know there’s no space for their kids.
Post # 6
@bride2beIn2012: I dont want children there but everyone keeps telling me I have to invite them otherwise it is rude and offensive. I even suggested maybe putting no kids under 15… but was told that was offensive by the Mother-In-Law.
Post # 7
I like that you are trying to word it nicely. I think that those might beat around the bush too much, though. I agree with you that free flowing alcohol all night should be a hint that it’s not a kid appropriate party. I mean, I don’t hear ‘cocktail party’ and think ‘great, let’s pack up the baby and our 4 year old and head on out!’, lol! But everyone is different and may not think the same way.
Post # 8
@kitzy: Like the RSVP idea… wish I would have thought abt that before they were printed. lol
So then I am not crazy… its not rude to not invite kids?
Post # 9
I’m all about adult only receptions…but to many open bar they aren’t going to care about kids and drinking. Never was an issue when I was a kid…but now people will probably ignore and then get ofended and say it should be kid friendly. Now is it possible you could get a sitter/sitters lined up and area for parents to drop the kids? A friend did that because that is something people get bothered by…and some people might not have sitters available.
Post # 10
Not at all! Certain receptions are child friendly and certain ones aren’t. A reception where you know that people are going to imbibe, dance, get loud and paaartay – well, I don’t think that people want their kids around that atmosphere. I least if I had/wanted kids I would know that a cocktail type reception is not going to be a good spot for Junior, you know? 🙂
Post # 11
@krystal.keel: That has been a raging question on WB for ages. Do what’s appropriate for your vision. However, I’d get very pointed in letting people know that kids are not allowed if you know that your wedding is going to get … not kid friendly 🙂
Post # 12
We decided against kids at our wedding as well, lots do. We wrote on our invitation undert he hall name “Adult Reception” Of your 3 statements though, I like the first..date night. But I would also be blunt and write Adult Reception..as people just don’t get it, and its your night, can’t please everyone 🙂
Post # 13
I vote for the “Adults only please” in small font – it is simple and to the point. I also don’t think it is rude to not invite kids – we aren’t having kids at our reception either. But you and Fiance should probably sit down with your Mother-In-Law and have a discussion about what you guys want/plan to do for the reception so everyone is on the same page.
Post # 14
I am going to xpressly states “Adult only” on my invites. Some may find this rude or tacky even, but in my circle if i’m not firm about it people will walk all over me, and my new venue is quite strict with the numbers. And to be honest none of your “phrases” really get the message across that you dont want kids there.
Post # 15
No matter what you do someone will be unhappy so I vote for making yourself happy! When I told my aunt who lives 3 states away we were considering a “no kids” reception because it is going to be held at a hunt club and winery she was excited. When we told my Future Sister-In-Law the same thing (mind you she has 3 children about the same ages as my aunt’s children) she was annoyed about trying to find child care for 1 night. A hunt club and winery is not the appropriate place for small children but she assumed hers were invited and now her oldest daughter is going to be heartbroken when we have to tell her the event is “adults only”. Be direct, kind but direct.
Post # 16
If I’m understanding correctly, children were invited on the invitations, correct? So as other have suggested, I don’t think you can now write “Adults only please” on the website because that contradicts the invitation and will lead to confusion.
Of your three statements, I think they’re all pretty ambiguous. #1 to me reminds me that I should bring a date, #2 tells me you may be worried about children drinking from the open bar and #3 reminds me that I should arrange a ride home if I want to party.
If you’re going to have something on the website, I think it should be more direct, something along the lines of – While children are invited, please be aware that the reception may not be child appropriate as it will be a raucous party with open bar, drunken indulgence and the potential for gratuitous nudity. 🙂 Kidding on the last part – no matter what you write, this actually may be a message best spread by word of mouth.