(Closed) Need Help with Fi

posted 9 years ago in Fitness
Post # 3
398 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

My husband and I lost a lot of weight together prior to getting married, it was mostly a change that I wanted and the poor guy was kind of stuck doing it with me (oh well). 

We did a Weight Watchers thing but never paid a cent for it because you can find everything that you need online for free! 

I think the biggest shocker for us was when we first measured out food (and wrote it down) and realized just how much we were eating!  The key was buying local fruits and veggies, fresh meats etc and taking them home and basically pre packaging at the proper serving levels.  We did the same after we cooked a meal, if it was for four servings we would take it and split it into fours, two for lunch, two for dinner!

The key is going to be that you will have to help him through this change, it sounds like he wants to but doesn’t have the self control to do it himself.  Toss all the crap that is in your cupboard (for us initally this was a ton of food, Rice Roni, Mac & Cheese those numbers were just scary) and make changes for both of you, he will ultimately follow suit.  Set up a workout routine with treats upon completeing so many days in a row.  Eventually the healthy habits will just be normal and not such a big task!

Good Luck!

Post # 4
2249 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

I have gained a LOT of weight since college (the last time I was happy with it) and I am working to loose it too. My current plan is to get a box of organic veggies delivered and not eat anything else (within reason) until they are gone. Also could he join a local sports team? Even if he started a frisbee golf game it could help. Keep us updated on your progress!

Post # 5
1379 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

My fiance and I are both working together to lose weight. It is all about supporting each other and encouraging each other … but I would rather share the story of my brother.

He was actually always the skinny kid growing up and all the way through high school — he played football and my mom used to make him protein shakes and force feed him steak and pasta cause she was afraid he was going to get hurt – ha!! Then he went to college and discovered beer and late night binge eating and gained a lot of weight, probably about 80 pounds over the course of 7 years.  He got married about five years ago and lost a significant amount of weight for his wedding, by harsh and unrealistic dieting. He obviously quickly gained it back after the wedding. Since then he and his wife had a baby girl!!  She just turned two. At her birthday party they were playing outside and he found himself short of breath – something that shocked him a month before his own 30th birthday.  He made a decision then and there that he had to do something. He would not be the father that couldnt keep up with his children, or that wouldnt even be there to see her grow up. He was scared.  He went to a gym down the street from his office that was offering one week free. The one week free came with an intial training session with a professional trainer. The trainer asked him to do a few simple things (treadmill, pushups, sit ups) and my brother was gasping almost immediately. He finished the test and asked the trainer what he thought, the trainer asked if he wanted him to be honest, and he said yes. The trainer said he was obese, and if he continued the way he was living his life he would become sick, if not die, by the time he was 50. 

My brother has gone back to that gym 5 days a week for the last 7 weeks and has lost 12 pounds. Now is that a lot of weight?  Not necessarily. But he has changed his lifestyle. He works it into his routine. Him and his wife have rearranged pick up and drop off of their daughter so that my brother can make it to the gym. They take walks on the weekends and cook and eat heathier dinners. 

Long (super long) story short – he came to the realization that he was barely 30 years old and was so out of shape he could barely walk a mile, let alone run one. He wouldnt have that. He made the decisoin himself.  You can help your fiance get to that point, but he has to decide on his own whether or not he is ready for a life change. Get some DVDs that are made for men (there are a bunch!) or do the DVDs with him and laugh through it. I bet he would be shocked if he went to the gym and realized he wasn’t the biggest person there. Encourage him, but don’t push him, and feel free to share my brother’s story. I think it’s inspirational. 

Good luck!

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