(Closed) Need help wording text to ask for loaned money back?

posted 2 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
155 posts
Blushing bee

Send the music video for Rihanna’s “B!tch Better Have My Money”? lol.

No, what you’ve suggested is totally appropriate. 

Post # 4
1117 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Do you need the money? I would just give it to her as a gift and be done with it. $200 to her is a bigger deal than it is to you. I would text her and ask her how she is. I’m sure she’ll bring the money up, but just tell her not to worry about it.

I would use this as a lesson to never loan money out again. Only give it as a gift. It just makes things awkward later.

Post # 5
223 posts
Helper bee

What you said is fine. It wasn’t a gift, it was a loan. You felt pressured into it in the first place. I don’t think you should just give her the money unless you can easily afford to and more importantly want to.

Post # 6
1611 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

You should always consider a loan a donation because it may never be returned. 

But if you really want it back, I would talk over the phone or in person. Text is way too impersonal and casual for something as serious as asking for a loan to be returned. 

Post # 7
3724 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

It sounds to me she was only saying she’d pay you back as a formality and has neither the means nor intention to actually do so. I would consider it gone and find comfort in the fact that it helped someone. It is my experience that money lent rarely gets paid back. 

Post # 8
6361 posts
Bee Keeper

cherryfox22 :  If you are really strapped for money I’d do the same thing she did and get it her to understand you can’t afford being $200 short.

Post # 9
813 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 1983

Yes–you did something nice for her, not she for you. You don’t have to apologize to her, which is what the tone sounds like now.

“Hi, Jane Doe–I need you to pay me back the $198.00 I lent you. When will you be able to do that?” And I wouldn’t send a text–I would email or call.

I also wouldn’t have a lot of hope of getting your money back. All you have on your side is being right–no way to compel her to repay you.

Post # 10
155 posts
Blushing bee

I don’t think you should write off the $200. Be kind but don’t be apologetic. Get a firm commitment on when she’s paying you back. 

Post # 12
3315 posts
Sugar bee

All it takes is a text – “hey, when will you pay me back?” You can be nicer, of course. She will probably just ignore it. So don’t feel bad sending it.

Post # 13
9648 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

You know, they say “only lend money if you’re ok with never getting it back.”  I know that advice comes too late, but it’s still relevant because the reason it’s general advice is that often loans aren’t repaid–especially given this particular person’s financial situation and the fact she doesn’t know you at all (no guilt to deal with on a daily basis).

As for your text, the first sentence is fine but I’d get rid of the “I don’t mean to bother you” and the word “just”.  You may want to consider offering installments–you’ll be more likely to get some of your money back, maybe even all of it eventually.

Post # 14
11958 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

cherryfox22 :  you’re probably not getting it back, but you should ask because she said she would pay you back. 

So send her a text, “hey so and so, hope you’re doing well. I was happy to be able to help you when your car got towed. I’d like to collect the $198.00 I lent you. When can you do this? “

Post # 15
377 posts
Helper bee

cherryfox22 :  I think the way you worded it sounds fine. It could be that she forgot or that she really doesn’t have it right now, but she may have some of it and might ask if it would be ok for her to pay you in installments, which is totally up to you. 

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