(Closed) Need MOH Advice!

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
242 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I would say go for it! Who cares what others might think/say. I think its awesome that you want to honour these special ladies in your life 🙂

Post # 4
Member
3471 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

I would have none before I would have 3– with 3 MOH’s you’re looking at too many chiefs and not enough indians.  I think making them all share the responsibility is more trouble than it’s worth. 

What I would recommend is ask all of them to be in your wedding party, then take them all out to lunch, or send them all a personal note saying that choosing 1 of them has been too difficult and you’d like them to please help you make the decision.  See who has the most flexible schedule, the least personal stuff going on, whatever they want to use to decide who should be the Maid/Matron of Honor.  My sister in law did that for her wedding where it was me and her 2 sisters.  She couldn’t choose between all of us, so she asked us to decide.  I was already the Maid/Matron of Honor for a wedding the month before theirs, and one of her sister’s just started a brand new job and likely wouldn’t have the flexibility to take time off for wedding related appointments, etc.  So we elected the other sister to be the MOH– she as thrilled, and everyone was happy. It worked out perfect. 

Post # 5
Member
986 posts
Busy bee

@juliette.eliza: I really like the idea about figuring out who is most interested/available to help and take on the responsibility. You may find that some of the ladies don’t want the extra responsibility. This could at least be a good starting point!

Post # 6
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

It’s your wedding – Have 3!!! BUT! I would divide the duties accordingly 1 will do the bridal shower, 1 will be in charge of the bachlorette, 1 will do the day of duties, or something like that. They can decide for themselves who does what (but it would be better if you chose) but you want only 1 person as the ring leader for each of these events. 

Post # 8
Member
242 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

No problem 🙂 Let us know how things turn out.

And welcome to the Bee btw!

Post # 9
Member
909 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

It is your wedding so you can do whatever you want! 3 Maid/Matron of Honor with 9 total Bridesmaid or Best Man sounds like a good ratio anyway!

Post # 10
Member
76 posts
Worker bee

I have a friend who is a twin, and the twins basically share a best friend.  So when their best friend got married, the twins assumed they would both be a Maid/Matron of Honor.  But the friend thought that she couldn’t have two MOH’s, so she chose someone else.  Both of the twins were a little hurt and confused.

Moral of the story: I think it’s fine to have 3 MOH’s, especially if those three girls are close with each other too.  Because the only weird part is who will plan certain events.  But if the three girls are friends, then I don’t see a problem!

Post # 11
Member
1599 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

If all 3 girls get along and work well together, it could probably work.

Also, is anyone going to be offended if you pick 1 girl to hold your bouquet, give a speech, etc? Just make sure the “duties” and/or privelages are all even so no one gets upset or offended. I think 3 Maid/Matron of Honor might cause headaches.

Personally, I would rather have no Maid/Matron of Honor than 3, but that’s just me. 

Post # 12
Member
222 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I know this is late but As someone who is a twin and had to suffer through a similar story miss blue whale posted about I would have much rather have been 1 of 2 MOH’s if it meant being in my best friends wedding who was like a sister to us both but she instead chose someone else she hardly knew just to not pick between us. It made us both so sad and a bit angry so 3 is better I think because sharing the responsibilities is a huge weight off of one persons shoulders.

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